IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people say advertising is extremely successful at persuading customers to buy. Others think customers do not get influenced because ads are common. Discuss both & give your opinion.

#people #customers #ads
Commercialization plays an essential role in influencing the mind of consumers,while others believe that they are not encouraged by these adds. In my perspective,adds give us information about the features of any stock ,so some people are admired by these and my viewpoints on these issues will be elaborated in the aforementioned paragraphs. On the one hand,when famous celebrities become the brand ambassadors of any
commodity
 ,
then
 masses get inspired from them and purchase that amount.
For instance
,A survey was conducted in India in 2018 and it had concluded that seventy per cent individuals are inspired by placard especially children because when they saw their famous star in that endorsement ,
then
 they want to buy that
commodity
.Another feature of advertisement is that people get to know about the features of any brand and they are unaware of those and display bring light on that which persuade people to buy that
commodity
.
On the other hand
,some people believe that adds are really usual,so people do not get any kind of inspiration from these advertisements advertisement because these are fake and misleading and sometimes companies give money to online websites
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
so that they can show the various features of that product in order to increase the sale of that particular product. To recapitulate, I would like to write that people might get influenced by the quality and various features of the
commodity
,so adds are really essential to make people aware about the quality of that particular product.
Submitted by raman on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!