IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people choose to eat no meat or fish. They believe that this is not only better for their own health but also benefits the world as a whole. Discuss this view and give your own opinion.

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Nowadays,
v
Add an article
a
the

The noun phrase vegetarian and vegan diet seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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egetarian and vegan diet has become more popular than it was in the past
,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma before the dependent clause marker because. Consider removing the comma.

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 because it is said that consuming only vegetables (and fish, dairy products) could improve our health and save the Earth. In
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 essay, I will talk about
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 belief and will give my personal opinion.   In today's society, being fit and healthy is the lifestyle that most people wish. To
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 purpose, some of them decide to give up eating meat, fish and other animal products and balance their meals with only natural products, vegetables and fruits. They are certain that
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 diet is safer, that it has fewer calories so they can eat more and that it helps our digestion.
For Instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, I am a vegetarian, too. Since when I have stopped consuming meat, I have been feeling happier and fulfilled about myself, by seeing my body getting slimmer and smarter. Another important reason for why some people choose
v
Add an article
a

It appears that an article is missing before the word vegetarian. Consider adding the article.

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egetarian diet is because they want to save animals and the world. A recent survey about animals has reported that over 20 billion chickens, 27 billion pigs and 15 billion cows were being killed for our wants of meat
last
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 year, and these trends are forecast double in ten years.   In conclusion, the consumption of animal products should be restricted by governments in order to kill fewer animals, but it is still impossible to make it come true. I hope that all beings living on the Earth can be treated equally.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Plant-based diet
  • Chronic diseases
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Deforestation
  • Water consumption
  • Mitigate climate change
  • Natural resources
  • Animal welfare
  • Humane and ethical choice
  • Healthcare costs
  • Sustainable farming
  • Legumes
  • Fruits and vegetables
  • Vegetarian
  • Vegan
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