Some people think that the government should increase tax on unhealthy food to encourage people to start eating healthy. Do you agree or disagree?
Needless to say
that
Correct determiner usage
the
consumption
of fast food
adversely affecting
the health of Wrong verb form
affects
a
human Correct article usage
apply
being
. Some Fix the agreement mistake
beings
people
claimed
Wrong verb form
claim
,
it is essential to impose a high tax on Remove the comma
apply
junk
foodstuff because it may discourage people
from eating fast food
. In my opinion, hefty charges can reduce the consumption
rate but will not motivate them for
nutritious Change preposition
to
food
items, and I would
explain some points which strengthen my viewpoint in the upcoming paragraphs.
Wrong verb form
will
To begin
with, imposing heavy levies on fast food
means an increase in price
Correct article usage
the price
on
commodities which directly Change preposition
of
affect
the middle class and poor Correct subject-verb agreement
affects
people
. To be more specific, junk
food
like burgers, pizzas and street foods available
at affordable rates at various apps like Add a missing verb
are available
zomato
and Change the capitalization
Zomato
swiggy
. Change the capitalization
Swiggy
Consequently
working people
and students who live away from homes prefer junk
food
because they do not have enough time to prepare a meal. Eventually, if the government increase the tax on fast food
, it will not affect the rich people
they will continue to consume it.
On the other hand
, there some
other methods through which Add a missing verb
are some
this
problem could be solved. First is
, healthy foodstuff should be more affordable and accessible so that everyone, especially Unnecessary verb
apply
weaker
section of Correct article usage
the weaker
the
society can easily buy it and easily Correct article usage
apply
approachable
Correct word choice
accessible
for
Change preposition
to
the
working Correct article usage
apply
people
. Because many
Correct word choice
Many
people
are aware of the ill effect
of unhealthy eating habits but the availability of Fix the agreement mistake
effects
ready to eat
Add a hyphen
ready-to-eat
food
is comparatively more than healthy products. Moreover
, the government ought to organize a health awareness campaign in different areas which give
information not only about healthy and unhealthy Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
food
but also
explain
the harmful impacts of fast Correct subject-verb agreement
explains
food
.
In conclusion, nonetheless
imposing hefty charges on ready to eat
meals Add a hyphen
ready-to-eat
minimize
the Correct subject-verb agreement
minimizes
consumption
of unhealthy products, but it will deter low-income groups from buying them. Health
fitness Replace the word
Healthy
programme
and the awareness of self-discipline towards the eating pattern could certainly reduce the Fix the agreement mistake
programmes
consumption
rate of junk
foods.Submitted by Simran on
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task response
The essay does not fully address the task prompt. The argument is not developed enough and does not provide a clear position on whether the government should increase tax on unhealthy food. More focus and balance on arguments is needed.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, providing a clear structure to the essay. However, some parts of the essay lack coherence and could be organized in a better logical order.