IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Social Media has helped us increase our virtual networks . this has isolated us physically making us social awkward in person. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give you opinion.

The virtual world is
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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growing exponentially
due to
Linking Words
 the presence of many social networking
platforms
Use synonyms
,
Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 has made us immobile and
causing
Wrong verb form
caused
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 nuisance in our public life. I disagree
(
Punctuation problem
apply
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do not ) to
Verb problem
with
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 the statement
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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this
Linking Words
 essay will focus on how digital
platforms
Use synonyms
 improve social life. The digital media has made the long distances come short , with video calling and instant messaging
services
Punctuation problem
services,
show examples
 we can get updates of our close ones in a very short time.
For instance
Linking Words
,one can
face time
Use the right word
FaceTime
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 their friends in the US or Europe or even the Antarctic to get an update
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 them and even share our
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
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 and stories with no waste of time
, at
Punctuation problem
. At
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 no point in history was
this
Linking Words
 possible to have
such
Linking Words
 instant feedback or sharing of emotions in
such
Linking Words
 quick succession. Digital media deepens the bonds between people and makes them excited for the next meetings. These
platforms
Use synonyms
 can
also
Linking Words
 help in avoiding any conflicts of
interests
Fix the agreement mistake
interest
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, there
Punctuation problem
. There
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 are people across the globe who may share the same interests
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 with virtual networks,they can join together, create harmony
Punctuation problem
, adding
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adding
Wrong verb form
and add
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 more economy
Punctuation problem
. Also
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also
Linking Words
 booms with
such
Linking Words
 these
platforms
Use synonyms
 as
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
gives
Correct subject-verb agreement
give
show examples
 opportunities to have a look at different places, plan and book
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
visits to these serene places .
For example
Linking Words
, one can use Air BnB ,Uber or
goibibo
Fix capitalization
Goibibo
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 to
books
Wrong verb form
book
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 hotels,
ticket
Fix the agreement mistake
tickets
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etc
Punctuation problem
, etc
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 and
hence
Linking Words
 encourage tourism.
To conclude
Linking Words
, in my opinion,social media is a place where we can learn, meet and share our thoughts with
masses
Correct article usage
the masses
show examples
 and has no impact on social life. These digital networks help us keep
communication
Check wording
in touch
show examples
 with our close ones where daily meetings are not practically possible.

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Task response
Be clear on your view in the intro and stay with it in the essay.
Coherence and cohesion
Make a plan in the intro: have one idea per paragraph and end with a short conclusion.
Coherence and cohesion
Start each paragraph with a clear topic sentence and connect ideas with simple linking words.
Task response
Give real and simple examples to back each point and explain how they show your view.
Language use
Check spelling and grammar; keep sentences short and easy to read.
content
The idea that online tools help us keep in touch is clear.
content
There are real examples like video calls and sites for travel.
structure
The essay has three parts: intro, body, and conclusion.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • connect
  • online
  • offline
  • face-to-face
  • real life
  • social
  • media
  • networks
  • relationships
  • awkward
  • shy
  • confident
  • increase
  • decrease
  • benefit
  • drawback
  • active
  • passive
  • interaction
  • habit
  • balance
  • practice
  • communication
  • support
  • community
  • time
  • meetup
What to do next:
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