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Band 4.5

University students always focus on one specialist subject, but some people think universities should encourage their students to study a range of subjects in addition to their own subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#university #students #focus #specialist #people #universities #study #range #subjects #addition
There is a debate
of
Verify preposition usage
about
on
show examples
 whether tertiary students should take
d
Add an article
the
a
show examples
ifferent
subject
 as
oppose
Change the form of the verb
opposed
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 to focus on their one specific
subject
. While some people believe that studying different subjects apart from their own
subject
 brings benefits for the tertiary students, I,
however
, side with those who believe it does not for three main reasons.
First
 of all, diversify the
subject
 of the area of university students may bring financial hardship
f
Add the particle
to
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orm them. Nowadays most of the university’s students struggle to pay their
program
 fees and most of they need to obtain a
student
 loan.
Therefore
, adding more subjects to
theirs
Correct the word
their
show examples
program
,
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apply
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 means increase the cost of their
program
.
Furthermore
, time is another reason. Most of the degree programs are fulltime
program
 which means most of the students will be at campus
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 in order to complete their
program
 within 3 years. If different subjects are added in their
program
, it will make their
program
 longer.
Moreover
, students
Correct your spelling
may
show examples
my
Delete the pronoun
apply
show examples
feel overwhelmed if more subjects are summed to their schedules. While I concede that learning different subjects may broader the students’ vision, I strongly believe
t
Add an article
a
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ertiary
student
 may lose their focus by adding different subjects in their curriculum.
For example
, if a medical
student
 adds sociology or history
subject
 in his/her schedule, he or she may expend more time studying it other
then
 subjects that are relevant to their field.
Consequently
, at the end of the term, they may fail the important subjects that are crucial for them in their careers or they will not have a great mark. To conclude,
although
 adding different
subject
 apart from the students’
subject
 may amplify their vision.
However
, I strongly believe that tertiary
student
 should put all their efforts towards their own
subject
 as at the end of their
program
 they have substantial knowledge about their field.
Submitted by amberlinck on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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