IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

It is becoming increasingly expensive for museums to be open to the public. What would be the best solution to keep them open in your opinion

#museums
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays,museums are gaining popularity across the world.Authorities are finding it very difficult to manage because of heavy spending on their maintenance.
This
Linking Words
 essay will explore how
this
Linking Words
 problem can be curtailed through the introduction of entertaining activities in museums,installations of the latest gadgets for making activities interesting and through cheap entrance fee.
Firstly
Linking Words
,through the introduction of an entertaining performance,
this
Linking Words
 problem can be curbed.People find museums in a boring place.In order to give an everlasting impact of museums on the minds of tourists,it is now mandatory to introduce some innovative and fun related-activities to attract more audience.Take an example of Taxila museum in Pakistan,where a lot of chairlifts and games have been installed ,which has tremendously enhanced the visitors' attention.
Thus
Linking Words
,innovative and fun-related things are important to keep museums alive and enhance their earnings.
Secondly
Linking Words
, high expenditures of museums can be tackled to a large extent through the installation of new gadgets.Young population feel more attraction towards new inventions,so a blending of old architecture with the latest technology will have a positive impact on the attendance of visitors to museums.
For instance
Linking Words
,The Palace museum in Australia,where display and data of all old antiques have been transformed into computers to give them a fascinating look which attracts thousands of tourists annually.
Hence
Linking Words
,maintenance cost can be generated through
this
Linking Words
 method.
Finally
Linking Words
, expensive fees are often considered to be the biggest hurdle in accumulating the visitors at museums.In order to boost the income of museums,authorities should reduce the entrance fee, which will definitely increase the numbers of tourists to museums. To conclude,I believe that museums are very expensive to maintain for the authorities,
however
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 issue can be tackled through the introduction of entertaining activities,installing the latest machines and through reducing the entrance fee.
Submitted by aadidoc508 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: