Some people think that young people should spend their free time with their families instead of enjoying outside entertainment. However, others disagree. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

#people #time #families #entertainment

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Many people hold a contrarian view regarding the spending of

time

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in leisure activities. while many argue that it is better to allocate

this

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time

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in socializing with family members to keep the culture intact, I think engaging in other forms of

entertainment

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also

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essential which can be integrated with family members. Family forms the priority to encourage social development in the technology-dominated world. These days, youngsters are addicted completely to modern gadgets like computers connected with internet that has diverted their mind to the virtual world. It,

thus

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, leaves them disintegrated from their family.

Furthermore

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, spending

time

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with family would build the cultural qualities that are at the verge of extinction.

For instance

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, several youths have embraced the modern culture motivated by western qualities which have superseded the old cultural which include dining together, watching

entertainment

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together, and helping them completing household.

On the other hand

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, there are two main reasons why the diversity of free-

time

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activity must

also

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take place. One main reason is to destress from burdensome daily routine.

For example

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, nowadays, most of the young ones are either engaged in academic or other work-related activities that make them feel exhausted. If they involve in outside environment, they will be able to reverse

this

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abnormal mental strain and revive themselves. Another reason is outside

entertainment

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increases the network of like-minded people. Unlike only spending

time

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with family members, the

time

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spent through association with people at sports centres, clubs or public parks develops a building of potential relationships that are linked with professional goals. In conclusion, in my opinion, giving

time

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to family is vital for the social development of the individuals, but it should not restrict them from exploring

entertainment

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that takes away from home. Certainly spending

time

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outside is

also

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essential to build external relationships and decrease stress, though sometimes these kinds of

entertainment

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can

also

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be done with families.

Submitted by abhi on Tue Oct 06 2020

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

316 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

bond
relationship
communication
experience
learn
opportunity
exposure
culture
perspective
development
interest
skill
socialize
peer
broaden
horizon
opinion

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Some people think that young people should spend their free time with their families instead of enjoying outside entertainment. However, others disagree. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

Convenience foods will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional foods and tradition methods of food preparation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

The percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.

In this day and age,it is considered by a plethora of individuals that,adults had better follow the pattern of old people others consider that it is natural instinct for teenagers to challenge what older people say.This essay will outline both arguments,and then conclusion will be drawn.

can you tell me the sequence of instant noodle manufacturing?