In the past, many people had skill such as making their own clothes and doing repair to things in the house. In many countries, nowadays, skills like these are disappearing. Why do you think this change is happening? how far is this situation true in your country?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Needless to say, in the
last
Linking Words
century, a lot of individuals had various techniques
such
Linking Words
as creating wood furniture by themselves and making their own garments. But as our technology have been developing quickly in
this
Linking Words
day and age, those techniques have been fading. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,
show examples
I will attempt to outline the reason regarding
this
Linking Words
topic and discuss the issue in my country. To commence with, no one can argue with the fact that technologies bring our life more convenience than the past, indeed. people purchase their own garments in the cloths shop
instead
Linking Words
Add the preposition
of
show examples
making by themselves. In
this
Linking Words
modern day
Add a hyphen
modern-day
show examples
, our garments are making by manufacturer, they have a lot of
machine
Change to a plural noun
machines
show examples
which can make garments faster than make by their own hands.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in the capital city
Add a comma
,
show examples
we can find out many affordable furniture or
iteam
Correct your spelling
item
to satisfy our needs. In the past, they didn’t
had
Change the verb form
have
show examples
enough resource they can found in their town
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
show examples
therefore
Linking Words
people had to
created
Change the form of the verb
create
show examples
by themselves,
thus
Linking Words
, our ancestor
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
to learn various of techniques in order to satisfy their daily needs. Setting a said the reason accorded with
this
Linking Words
trend.
This
Linking Words
phenomenal
Replace the word
phenomenon
show examples
is happening in my hometown. Taipei city is a capital city in Taiwan, in
this
Linking Words
forest of modern buildings we can buy every product we need
such
Linking Words
as sofa, costumes and ingredients to name a few.
Hence
Linking Words
, all we need to do it is going to the shop and pay, so people don’t need to wast their time and power to make it .
Consequently
Linking Words
, people wouldn’t learn any relevant skill.
Naturelly
Correct your spelling
Naturally
, those
skill
Change the determiner
skills
show examples
have been disappearing in our life. To sum up, in
this
Linking Words
day and age, the marketing can satisfy our needs rapidly, thank
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
our technology is bring our life
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
easier than past,
on the other hand
Linking Words
, we lose an opportunity to learn
n
Add an article
a
show examples
ew skill.
Submitted by atruru0427 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: