IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#money #businesses #responsibilities
Making a profit has long been the top priority of all businesses, yet there has been a growing concern about their corporate social responsibilities. I would argue that companies are obliged to contribute more to
society
 rather than sampling making money. On the one hand, I accept that businesses must make money in order to survive in the modern competitive world. It is true that the meaning of the existence of a firm to generate profits for its shareholders and founders maintain operational activities. In fact, production profits after cost deduction,
such
 as rentals, employee payrolls, utilities, taxes would be important to determine company survival. If a company is unable to make profits, it will stop running and go bankrupted, meaning that social obligations become irrelevant.
In other words
, a company can only make a positive contribution to
society
 if it is in good financial health. I believe that
besides
 the sole aim of maximizing profit, companies have a wider role to play in modern
society
.
Firstly
, in fact, through their manufacturing process, companies could exploit natural resources and discharge toxic sewage without proper treatment, which might lead to irreversible implications for the environment.
As a result
, firms should invest in their waste treatment systems to mitigate environmental footprint as well as sponsor environmental protection campaigns of the local authorities, which would ensure the suitable expansion of international companies.
Furthermore
,
instead
 of taking advantage of accounting loopholes, companies should be committed to contributing to
society
 through the tax system, which would foster local prosperity and well-being in the long run.   In conclusion, I believe that companies should place as much importance on their social responsibilities as they do on their financial objectives.
Submitted by nguyenductamanh on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Social responsibilities
  • Corporate social responsibility
  • Ethical behavior
  • Societal impact
  • Stakeholders
  • Profit-driven
  • Public perception
  • Environmental sustainability
  • Community development
  • Human rights
  • Workplace safety
  • Altruism
  • Balanced approach
  • Accountability
  • Consumer loyalty
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