Most People Have Forgotten The Meaning Behind Traditional Or Religious Festival’s During Festival Periods ,People Now a Days Only Way to Enjoy Themselves To What Agree or Disagree with this opinion.

Many
argues
Change the verb form
argue
show examples
that many people have
forgetten
Correct your spelling
forgotten
the traditional or religious significance of the events. I
uterrly
Correct your spelling
utterly
agree with
this
opinion,
this
essay will opine my opinions with relative illustrations.
To begin
with, the importance of religious or traditional holidays has lost their actual traditional meaning to it.
For instance
, these days, Chinese new year has become more like a national holiday in
South Eastern
Add a hyphen
South-Eastern
show examples
countries, traditionally it was celebrated for over 9 days with all the families coming to their native villages to enjoy with their families
wherelse
Correct your spelling
whereas
wheels
, it has more become a corporate holiday promoting consumerism.
Simirarly
Correct your spelling
Similarly
, today there are many holidays that came into existence due to our
socities
Correct your spelling
societies
.
For example
, in India, Children's day is celebrated to honour the love of their
first
prime minister, Nehru. He loved children, so on his birthday, nation
celebrate
Change the verb form
celebrates
show examples
Children day to honour his legacy. To sum up, we have gotten so busy with our lives that we do not celebrate our cultural holidays as it used to be, which
also
meant
n
Add an article
the
a
show examples
ewer generation are not aware of their traditional
vaules
Correct your spelling
values
. As a society,
it
Delete the pronoun
apply
show examples
our
responsibilty
Correct your spelling
responsibility
to teach them
of
Verify preposition usage
apply
show examples
our values.
Submitted by rumaishauzair on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: