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Band 7

parents of obese children should be punished for making them fat ? Do you agree or disagree?

#parents #children
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The young generation is capable of choosing the right way to live their life.Nowadays most of the population lead a sedentary lifestyle which leads them to diseases like obesity. Many believe that parents of these obese children should be punished for making them fat. I completely disagree with
this
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 opinion.
Firstly
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, every parent wants their children to be healthy and live a healthy life. Most kids these days indulge themselves activities where there are no health benefits
such
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 as playing video games on the computer.They prefer to sleep all day rather than go outside and participate in healthy tasks like exercises. They have chosen their behaviour whether it is good or bad not their parents.
For instance
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, previously a study has shown that most of the kids spend their time on the computer despite the best efforts of their parents encouraging them to go out and play.
Secondly
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, kids have picked up bad eating habits which lead them to live an unhealthy lifestyle.
This
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 generation has the privilege of having a lot of non-healthy food items at their disposal. They borrow money from their parents and consume junk food from outside. Many parents advise their offspring to start eating healthy. A study has shown that around 46% of the youth have been able to change their unhealthy lifestyle to a healthy one because of the support provided by their parents. In my opinion
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,
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I would like to conclude by saying parents should not be punished for making their children obese because they do not control the lives or the future of their children.
Submitted by ehte477 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • obesity
  • genetics
  • socio-economic status
  • nutritional education
  • physical activity programs
  • adverse effects
  • mental health issues
  • responsibility sharing
  • implementation
  • privileged families
  • supportive environment
  • lifestyle changes
  • educational campaigns
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