Some studies suggest criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, the best way to reduce crime levels is to educate people in prisons so that they can get a job after they are released from prison. To what extent, do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Concerning the issue of
crime
Use synonyms
’s bad influence
to
Verify preposition usage
on
show examples
society, people hold different views. An army of people reckons that prisoner education while they are still in prison is really necessary to prevent
crime
Use synonyms
rates and help them get new chances after being released. From my perspective, I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
statement for many convincing reasons. On the one hand, it can be seen that committing a
crime
Use synonyms
often happen with bad people and ignorant people. To details, when students that they do not have much attention from their parents, they are more likely
c
Add the particle
to
show examples
ontact with a bad target. Since
then
Linking Words
, students will be formed some terrible habits like skipped school and lazier in acquiring knowledge.
Besides
Linking Words
,
e
Add an article
the
show examples
ducation system
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
to put more moral lesson into study programs in primary school immediately. These will help control
students’s
Remove the s
students’
show examples
character and help them avoid falling into evils.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, with the opinion of
educate
Change the verb form
educating
show examples
prisoner as early as they are still staying there
also
Linking Words
a good method. Prisoners have to be trained to do manual work and joining some public service. It
not just makes
Change the verb form
does not just make
show examples
them forget criminal thoughts, but
also
Linking Words
help them get familiar looking for a stable job after
released
Change the form of the verb
release
show examples
.
Likewise
Linking Words
, prisoners need to be
addition
Replace the word
added
show examples
about
Verify preposition usage
to
show examples
law lessons. Namely, they will feel
trully
Correct your spelling
truly
to be shy if they commit a
crime
Use synonyms
again while they taught in terms of judgments that they could make mistakes in the future. In summary, for the reasons mentioned above, it can be affirmed that declining
crime
Use synonyms
is
is
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
essential.
Thus
Linking Words
, it is highly recommended that the
gorvnment
Correct your spelling
government
should create more efficient measures to deleted all dangerous
crime
Use synonyms
for each country.
Submitted by phamnhung0007 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: