Many cities are replacing cars with bicycles. What are the reasons for this? Which do you think is better?
In the contemporary era, for the well-being of society, many nations are promoting
bicycles
for commuting instead
of cars. This
shift from four-wheelers to two-wheelers would prove to be an effective measure for not only people
's health but also
serve as a great aid to protect the environment.
To embark upon a discussion, opting bicycles
in place of cars would prove to be a productive step in reducing car pollution. Nowadays, pollution is one of the major Change preposition
for bicycles
cause
of Fix the agreement mistake
causes
people
's health problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
such
as asthma, tuberculosis and so on. Besides
this
, if people
use cars instead
of bicycles
, then
it increases the poisonous gases and contaminated
the city air. Wrong verb form
contaminates
For example
, many experts claimed that those countries which ride bicycles
have a better air quality index and public health compared to other nations.
Furthermore
, in many countries, more number of
vehicles have saturated the roads and Correct quantifier usage
apply
increase
traffic problems. Wrong verb form
increased
This
has caused delay
and a waste of precious time Fix the agreement mistake
delays
of
Change preposition
for
public
. Correct article usage
the public
To Instance
, by the usage of Correct your spelling
For instance
bicycles
individuals could avoid these difficulties and reach their destination on time. Apart from it
, Correct pronoun usage
this
this
positive change could also
help in mitigating the automobiles which are wandering on the roads.
Moreover
, obesity is also
a burgeoning issue these days because people
used
vehicles for Wrong verb form
use
a
shorter Correct article usage
apply
distance
Fix the agreement mistake
distances
Rephrase
apply
also
. To eradicate this
, bicycles
are the best options which help in reducing weight. To illustrate, when people
ride a bicycle they use their physical strength and burn calories which helps them to stay fit and active. Also
, a riding bicycle helps people
to reduce stress and make them feel relax
. Eventually, they become mentally and physically sound.
Wrong verb form
relaxed
To conclude
, I believe that if nations adopt this
strategy then
it would come with a great benefit for the citizens and the environment as well. Hence
, the Community become more healthy and nature become less polluted.Submitted by kaurrajwant0208 on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures to avoid repetition and enhance readability. You tend to use 'To + verb' at the beginning of many sentences, which can become repetitive.
Task Achievement
Expand on your examples with more specific details to illustrate your points better. For instance, mention specific countries or cities that have successfully implemented bike-friendly policies.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure grammatical accuracy by checking for minor errors in verb tense and singular/plural consistency. For instance, 'cause of people's health problem' should be 'cause of people's health problems.'
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your argument.
Task Achievement
Your main points are relevant and address the task prompt comprehensively.
Task Achievement
You provide logical reasons for why bicycles are being promoted over cars and explain the benefits well.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?