Many cities are replacing cars with bicycles. What are the reasons for this? Which do you think is better?

In the contemporary era, for the well-being of society, many nations are promoting
bicycles
for commuting
instead
of cars.
This
shift from four-wheelers to two-wheelers would prove to be an effective measure for not only
people
's health but
also
serve as a great aid to protect the environment. To embark upon a discussion, opting
bicycles
Change preposition
for bicycles
show examples
in place of cars would prove to be a productive step in reducing car pollution. Nowadays, pollution is one of the major
cause
Fix the agreement mistake
causes
show examples
of
people
's health
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
such
as asthma, tuberculosis and so on.
Besides
this
, if
people
use cars
instead
of
bicycles
,
then
it increases the poisonous gases and
contaminated
Wrong verb form
contaminates
show examples
the city air.
For example
, many experts claimed that those countries which ride
bicycles
have a better air quality index and public health compared to other nations.
Furthermore
, in many countries, more
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
vehicles have saturated the roads and
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
traffic problems.
This
has caused
delay
Fix the agreement mistake
delays
show examples
and a waste of precious time
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
.
To Instance
Correct your spelling
For instance
show examples
, by the usage of
bicycles
individuals could avoid these difficulties and reach their destination on time. Apart from
it
Correct pronoun usage
this
show examples
,
this
positive change could
also
help in mitigating the automobiles which are wandering on the roads.
Moreover
, obesity is
also
a burgeoning issue these days because
people
used
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
vehicles for
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
shorter
distance
Fix the agreement mistake
distances
show examples
Rephrase
apply
show examples
also
. To eradicate
this
,
bicycles
are the best options which help in reducing weight. To illustrate, when
people
ride a bicycle they use their physical strength and burn calories which helps them to stay fit and active.
Also
, a riding bicycle helps
people
to reduce stress and make them feel
relax
Wrong verb form
relaxed
show examples
. Eventually, they become mentally and physically sound.
To conclude
, I believe that if nations adopt
this
strategy
then
it would come with a great benefit for the citizens and the environment as well.
Hence
, the Community become more healthy and nature become less polluted.
Submitted by kaurrajwant0208 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures to avoid repetition and enhance readability. You tend to use 'To + verb' at the beginning of many sentences, which can become repetitive.
Task Achievement
Expand on your examples with more specific details to illustrate your points better. For instance, mention specific countries or cities that have successfully implemented bike-friendly policies.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure grammatical accuracy by checking for minor errors in verb tense and singular/plural consistency. For instance, 'cause of people's health problem' should be 'cause of people's health problems.'
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your argument.
Task Achievement
Your main points are relevant and address the task prompt comprehensively.
Task Achievement
You provide logical reasons for why bicycles are being promoted over cars and explain the benefits well.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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