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Writing Samples
Band 5

Many elderly people are no longer looked after by their families but are put in care homes. what are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

#people #families #care #homes #trend
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In most recent years, a trend has been noticed that more and more elderly people are no longer looked after by their families but are put in
care
Use synonyms
 homes. I believe there are both advantages and disadvantages of
this
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 trend, and I will discuss both sides in the following paragraphs and describe my opinions in the end. The advantages of sending elderly people in
care
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 homes are quite obvious.
First
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 of all, most people in today's worlds are getting busier and busier with their own lives,
such
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 as attending schools, going to work, looking after their children, or learning new life skills. There is limited time and
engergy
Correct your spelling
energy
 left for them to take good
care
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 of their parents or grandparents.
In addition
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, most people nowadays choose to live separately from their parents. Looking after the parents usually means travelling back and forth, and it will become even more time consuming and inconvenient if people are living in a city or a country
that is
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 far away from their parents' home.
Besides
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, not all people have sufficient skills and experiences to take
care
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 of elderly people, especially when there is a medical condition associated with
the
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elderly people. Putting the elderly people into
care
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 homes will help them receive more professional and proper
care
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 and help, which usually leads to a better quality of life.
However
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, putting elderly people in
care
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 homes will
definately
Correct your spelling
definitely
 bring a lot of disadvantages, especially to the elderly people themselves.
Firstly
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, not all
care
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 homes can provide the services of high quality. Lots of news and stories have revealed that many elderly people, especially the ones with disabilities or diseases, don't really get the services they need from
care
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 homes
,
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 or even have been abused by the staff in the
care
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 homes. Even though the
care
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 homes can offer professional and sufficient help to
the
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apply
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elderly people, it doesn't mean the elderly people don't need attention and
care
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 from their families and friends. Many elderly people are suffering from loneliness and frustration in
care
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 homes because not many families and friends come to visit them in the
last
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 years of their lives.
Besides
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 the disadvantages to the elderly people, the cost of
care
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 homes could
also
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 be a huge burden for the unwealthy families. Overall, sending elderly people to
care
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Verify preposition usage
for
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homes is probably a better choice or the only choice for some people who have little time or skills to take
care
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 of their parents. But it will
also
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 cause trouble for the elder people and their families. As far as I am concerned, people should not assume it will solve all the problems by letting the
care
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 home look after their parents.
Instead
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, people should still visit frequently and offer help and
care
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 to their parents even though they are in
care
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 homes. The
campanion
Correct your spelling
companion
 and love from the families and friends will help the elderly people have a better and happier life.
Submitted by hmycfamily on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Professional care
  • Medical attention
  • Trained staff
  • Social interaction
  • Combat loneliness
  • Safety and security
  • Relief for families
  • Loss of autonomy
  • Emotional impact
  • Cost
  • Financial strain
  • Quality of care
  • Neglect and abuse
  • Detachment from family
  • Mental wellbeing
What to do next:
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