Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

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There are two contrast arguments about the effects of advertisement, the

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first

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one

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is its significant influence on customers to force them to buy items which are not really needed. The other

one

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is the products advertised could aid users to improve their quality of life. In my opinion, I am convinced with the

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first

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argument and seemingly disagree with the

last

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one

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because of some reasons that will be explained

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Firstly

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, writing in the statement of the advantage of advertising,

this

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could tell customers that the new products may enhance their lives.

Nevertheless

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, it is not utterly true, in fact, producers tend to

over promote

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over-promote

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their products in order to sell as much as possible albeit nothing is actually good at the

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first

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version.

For example

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, the

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first

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printer was used a long time ago but, at that time, it was not too helpful for people until its later versions were released, faster, more sufficient and effective.

Secondly

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, it is about marketing.

In other words

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, the final ambition of the producer is to get as much profit as they can.

Thus

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, they tend to work out the best way to persuade us to buy items even if unnecessary.

For example

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, there was a trend to buy washing machines

last

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year after an attractive advertisement displayed on

the

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apply

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TV. After a few days, people lined up in the local stores to buy washing machines. I had asked some people why they had to purchase a new washing machine even though they already had

one

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, they answered it was because of the advertisement.

Thus

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, it is clearly the bad effect of

this

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kind of marketing. In conclusion, I agree with the idea that advertising may encourage people to buy unneeded things.

However

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, being deceived or not to buy, it is

also

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up to us.

Thus

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, why not consider deliberately before purchasing items?

dangvinh1212Sun Oct 25 2020

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12
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

312 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

encourage
persuade
manipulative
unnecessary
excessive
artificial needs
desires
consumers
oversaturation
impulse buying
financial problems
inform
educate
features
benefits
innovations
raise awareness
social issues
positive behavior
enrich
well-being

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