Some people believe that the whole family (grandparents, uncles, aunts) bringing up children is better rather than only parents. What is your opinion?

#people #grandparents #uncles #aunts #children #parents

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A section of society often argued that the entire family members

such

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as grandparents, uncles, and aunts can play a crucial role in the personality development of a child other than parents. I completely agree with

this

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statement due to these two main reasons.

Firstly

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, these family members can support minors in extreme conditions in the absence of parents.

Secondly

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, they can nurture the hidden talent of toddlers.

This

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essay will support my arguments in detail with relevant examples.

First

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of all, joint family members can support juveniles in emergency conditions in the absence of genitors. Nowadays, both mother and father are doing office jobs and teenagers often remain alone in the home after school.

As a result

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, sometimes they can become a victim of an accident or some physical injury. In that scenario, other family persons can cure them as soon as possible.

for example

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, the latest survey by "The Times of India" reveals that in 50% of cases of child accident, their family persons other than parents shifted them to the hospitals.

Secondly

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, joint family members can nurture the hidden ability of teenagers. It has been observed that in the absence of genitors, remaining family individuals spend maximum time with youngsters. Those family members can assist them in education as well as in sports programs.

As a result

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, teenagers can secure huge success in academics along with extracurricular activities.

For instance

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, during my school days, my uncle assists in education.

Therefore

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, I achieved tremendous marks in academic exams.

Hence

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, joint family members can prove to be a deciding factor in the overall success of the children. In conclusion, I firmly believe that joint family members not only assist the teenagers in emergency conditions but

also

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nurture the hidden talent of the children as well.

Submitted by john on Wed Oct 28 2020

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11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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Some people believe that the whole family (grandparents, uncles, aunts) bringing up children is better rather than only parents. What is your opinion?

Nowadays for many people internet is replacing books. What is your opinion?

People these days watch TV, films and other programs alone rather than with other people. Do this advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Childhood obesity is an increasing problem in Australia as many as two thirds of children are now obese. Schools have a responsibility to monitor what their students eat and the amount of exercise they do. To what extend do you agree to this statement?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?