Some people believe that individuals are responsible for their own personal happiness. Others argue that happiness can be affected by other factors. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #individuals #happiness #factors

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Happiness

Use synonyms

is the basic human emotion everyone want. People feel happy for different reasons and for different persons. Few people opine that individuals are responsible for their own

happiness

Use synonyms

, while others think it can be affected by other factors.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both views and conclude with my opinion. Most of the time in our lives, different occasions and different relations with people bring

happiness

Use synonyms

to us. The way they behave or treat us will make us happy. Sometimes, success and achievements can make us happy. In

this

Linking Words

world

Add a comma

show examples

everyone likes only the moments, people, things, food anything which can make them over the moon. People

also

Linking Words

want to spend

money

Use synonyms

on their

happiness

Use synonyms

. Few buy luxury goods, few donate

money

Use synonyms

for charities and others save

money

Use synonyms

for future generations. All these things in the world affect their

happiness

Use synonyms

and people have a strong desire for

such

Linking Words

items.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, many people find

happiness

Use synonyms

within themselves. They search for inner beauty and peace through meditation and by practising yoga. These people never find

happiness

Use synonyms

not only in the materialistic world

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

Linking Words

in people. They maintain neutrality and complete their responsibilities without any expectations. They never search

happiness

Use synonyms

in the

money

Use synonyms

or in things. Spiritually, they always connected to

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

divine power and always in a happy mood. To conclude, is all external factors responsible for our own

happiness

Use synonyms

? Personally, I don't think so. I believe it is always an individual who is responsible for his own

happiness

Use synonyms

. It's not easy to achieve that, that said practice and neutrality will help us to experience the ultimate

happiness

Use synonyms

Submitted by dheerajsudarsanam on Sun Nov 01 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

270 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Natural resourses, such as water , forests and oil are being used at an excessive rate. What is the main cause of this problem? How can this issue be solved?
It is seen that planets resources are being consumed at an alarming rate. The primary cause of this phenomenon is the wasteful lifestyle in many countries in the west and the most viable solution is to educate their young people about this issue.
4.5
band
Some people today prefer to get advice online for medical problems and do not want to visit a doctor. Why is this? Is this a positive or a negative development?
Due to cutting-edge technology, now everything is available on the internet. Even learning to earn, the internet is playing an indispensable role. So, it is argued that people tend to ask about their medical problems like diabetes, hypertension; but, they are reluctant to visit doctors. I think it is a negative development for their physical and mental growth.
6.5
band
Many people believe that social networking sites (such as facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?
It is considered by many that social media sites bring detrimental consequences towards both individuals and the community. However, this essay disagrees with the statement because social networking sites can provide information or news faster to society and valuable educational resources for students.
7
band
It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?
Some say that taking more personal and professional risks is crucial to living a fulfilling life. In contrast, others argue that it’s much safer to limit taking risks and lead a stable and predictable life. This essay will argue that the advantages of taking risks far outweigh the drawbacks. This essay will first discuss that, through risk-taking, people can open doors for new opportunities and enhance their critical thinking skills, followed by an analysis of how its primary disadvantage, the possibility of failure, can be easily aided and should not hinder people from taking risks.
7
band
Should arts-related entertainment venues such as museums and art galleries be free of charge for the general public, or should a charge apply for admittance? Discuss this issue, and give your opinion.
First, making museums and art galleries free would ensure that everyone, regardless of their financial situation, has access to culture and education. Art should not be a luxury only for those who can afford it; it is an important part of our collective heritage. Free admission allows people from diverse socioeconomic backgrounds to experience and appreciate art, history, and culture, enriching their lives. For example, some countries, like the UK, offer free entry to many of their national museums, ensuring that visitors of all ages and incomes can benefit from these cultural institutions. This inclusivity helps create a more educated and culturally aware society.

Some people believe that individuals are responsible for their own personal happiness. Others argue that happiness can be affected by other factors. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Natural resourses, such as water , forests and oil are being used at an excessive rate. What is the main cause of this problem? How can this issue be solved?

Some people today prefer to get advice online for medical problems and do not want to visit a doctor. Why is this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Many people believe that social networking sites (such as facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Should arts-related entertainment venues such as museums and art galleries be free of charge for the general public, or should a charge apply for admittance? Discuss this issue, and give your opinion.