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Writing Samples
Band 4

Many think playing sports is meant to teach children teamwork, while others feel it is important for them to learn to be competitive. Discuss both sides.

#sports #children #teamwork
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Although
Linking Words
,
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apply
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 there is a widespread
believe
Replace the word
belief
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 that
sport
Change the noun form
sports
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 games ought to teach children to compete, it is sometimes thought that the main idea is about cooperation. Personally, I support the former view because social skills foster a sense of community and safety.
Firstly
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,
this
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 essay will discuss the way of communicating which can lead to success, and,
secondly
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, it will analyze the benefits of being competitive with peers. On the one hand, some people think that children who learn to speak with others in a constructive way can reach everything they want in their future
life
Use synonyms
 and I agree.
In other words
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, the ability to communicate and speak out loud about your needs can solve a large
amount
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number
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 of issues that can appear in the future.
Furthermore
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, without these skills children would feel solitary and it is hard to deal with conflicts and confrontations. According to the research about mental health in England in 2017, children who used to play team sports have happier and balanced
life
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 when they grow up.
On the contrary
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, it is often believed that children who learn to be competitive while playing
sport
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sports
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 games can be independent in their
life
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 to reach their goals.
Additionally
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, the competition between students motivates them to excel in their studies and they can set the bar looking to the real better achievements of their teammates. Not only they are taught to do their best, but
also
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 they truly believe they can do everything on their own and nothing is impossible for them. During
to
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apply
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the association of psychologist of London
Add a comma
,
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it is more than common for children to have a better career and success in
life
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 in the future with great competition skills in
life
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. In conclusion, while people may vary in their opinions, I think that children’s mental health is more crucial than success in general
that is
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 why teamwork seems to
me
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be
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 better than being competitive.
Submitted by Nataliia Litovchenko on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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