A woman's place in the home. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#woman #place #home

Many

says

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say

show examples

that women's place is there home. I

uterrly

Correct your spelling

utterly

disagree with

this

statement and

this

following essay will opine my opinion using relative

illusrations

Correct your spelling

illustrations

To begin

the deliberation,historically women's role in society was a home-maker. They were not allowed to leave their house without their husband's permission.

For example

, In the United States

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till 1960s women were not even allowed to vote, it was that year the women revolution took place and women fought their rights and won.

Thus

, It took years of

scarifice

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sacrifice

and struggle of women around the

world

to gain

Add an article

the

show examples

ight to equality in the patriarchal

world

. Women

has

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have

show examples

proven their worth in every field of the

world

. Since gaining rights women has actively

partcipated

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participated

Add an article

the

show examples

ield of sciences, education,etc.

For instance

, a

nobel

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Nobel

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award winner madam curie carved a path for many women to follow and actively participate in inventing new technologies.

Therefore

, women

contribting

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contributing

contribution

and making

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apply

show examples

society a better place.

Futhermore

Correct your spelling

Furthermore

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

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educated women raise

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apply

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educated children. Women

brings

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bring

show examples

up generations, so it is important

Verify preposition usage

for

show examples

women to be educated and independent.

For example

, if a woman who has not explored the

world

and stepped out their house will not able to teach their offsprings

world

values that can only be

gainned

Correct your spelling

gained

expriences

Correct your spelling

experiences

experience

. To sum up, Women are very strong beings, and they should be given equal

opporunity

Correct your spelling

opportunity

to proves themselves and rise higher in every walk of life.

Submitted by rumaishauzair on Tue Nov 03 2020

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

237 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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A woman's place in the home. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people think that those working in creative arts should be financially supported by governments. Others think they should find financial support from other resources. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Young adults are now choosing to wait until later in life, often until they are in their 30s, to settle down and get married. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

It is important for people to take risk, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Global warming is one of the most serious issues that the world is facing to day. What are the causes of global warming and measures can goverments and individuals take to tackle the issue

Information technology is changing many aspects of our lives and now dominates our home, leisure and work activities. To what extent do the benefits of information technology outweigh the disadvantages?