Nowadays, child labor has become a major concern. why it is so? What can be done to solve this problem?

#child #labor #concern

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It is important that actions are taken to combat these problems. In order to solve

this

Linking Words

problem

Add a comma

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it’s necessary

first

Linking Words

that family nurture them to an interest in their studies and support them

also

Linking Words

provides them with psychological comfort and security because the main factor in the prosperity of children is the surrounding environment

as well as all they need

Add the comma(s)

, as well as all they need,

show examples

is peace and safety. Another answer to

this

Linking Words

pressing issue is to avoid falling into these crises, the law must prevent children from working and if they violate the system, will require them to pay fines. In conclusion, children are a new generation for

the

Change the article

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better future. Raising, taking care of and stimulating them is the biggest motivation to reach successful life and effective businesses.

However

Linking Words

, child

labor

Change the spelling

labour

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are

Change the verb form

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a victim of

the

Remove the article

apply

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society.

In addition

Linking Words

, we should pay attention to the prevalence of

this

Linking Words

problem.

Submitted by arkoyusuf1998 on Sat Nov 07 2020

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

2 paragraphs

146 words

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Nowadays, child labor has become a major concern. why it is so? What can be done to solve this problem?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

It is a commonly held belief that the death penalty is a good deterrent to prevent heinous crimes. However, others believe that life long sentence is a better deterrent. Discuss both views

Some people believe teenagers should focus on all subjects equally, whereas other people think that they should concentrate on only those subjects that they find interesting and they are best at. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing.

As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?