There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

#music #world #country

these past decade

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this past decade

these past decades

show examples

Add an article

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ariety of

musics

Change the wording

music

kinds of music

pieces of music

show examples

have been developing around the nations. Both traditional and modern

music

are

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still becoming

part

Add an article

the

show examples

usic industry until now. In my opinion, both genres are important and have their own impact

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the community. The reasons why people need

music

will be described in

this

essay.

First

of all,

music

is one of the sources of enjoyment which has been attracting people since the old days. The combination of the tones, sound of instruments and

rhytms

Correct your spelling

rhythms

produces a pleasant sound to the heart and many people enjoy

this

sensation. Since the ancient generation until now people included

music

in any kind of events

such

as festival, birthday celebration and wedding ceremony. The

second

reason

music

is needed because it is used as

the

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important

part

in a

pray

Replace the word

prayer

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ritual. As we can see in the churches, temples or even in a mosque,

music

is played as the compliment

part

of the pray.

Music

is believed as the

catalist

Correct your spelling

catalyst

of the pray to reach

the

Remove the article

apply

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God in

the

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apply

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Heaven faster. Comparing traditional

music

of a country and international

music

that is

heard by most of the folks recently is unfair. Traditional

music

And popular international

music

have their own

color

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colour

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and

being

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show examples

used for different purposes. Traditional

music

part

of the history and culture of its nation.

Moreover

, it usually plays in national

ocassions

Correct your spelling

occasions

or an event where cultural things are introduced to the other nations. Meanwhile, global

music

is a genre which

becoming

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became

show examples

well known because most of the society like it and it does not relate to previous history or heritage of

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pecific country. It often plays in radio, television programs and social media platforms and becoming more famous because people keep plays it. Overall, in my opinion, in the future

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both genre will still be played by many people and they will keep

enjoy

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enjoying

show examples

them.

Submitted by hardiyanti.marina.me on Wed Nov 25 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

316 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the ocuntry side is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Global warming is one of the biggest threats humans face in the 21st Century, and sea levels continue to rise at alarming rates. What problems are associated with this, and what are some possible solutions?

Some believe that students should begin learning a language very early in school while others think these subjects should be taught later. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

In recent years, some countries have experienced rapid economic development. This has resulted in much higher standards of living in urban areas but not in the country side. This situation may bring some problems for the country as a whole. What are these problems? How might they be reduced?p

Some people believe that people who read books can develop more imagination and language skills than those who prefer to watch TV. Do you agree or disagree?