Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own In many professional sports, there is an increase in the number of athletes using banned substances to improve their performance. What are the causes of the phenomenon and what are some of the possible solutions?

In recent times, the incidence of usage of drugs to enhance performance by athletes has been rising. The main culprit of
this
trend is the huge pressure faced by the player and it can easily be fixed by better screening for banned substances in
body
Add an article
the body
show examples
of the
sports person
Correct your spelling
sportsperson
show examples
.
This
essay will discuss the causes and provide solutions for
this
problem with a
resonable
Correct your spelling
reasonable
conclusion. The most important cause for athletes to consume unapproved supplements is because they are expected to win by a very
lage
Correct your spelling
large
population.
This
puts the
palyer
Correct your spelling
player
on the spot and they feel the need to win the tournament at any cost since
loosing
Correct your spelling
losing
show examples
is
asssociated
Correct your spelling
associated
with letting down the country
along with
thousands of people.
For instance
, many
psychologist
Change to a plural noun
psychologists
show examples
claim that
drug seeking
Add a hyphen
drug-seeking
show examples
behaviour in
sports
is associated with performance anxiety which is because of the pressure faced by the athlete.
However
,
such
incidences can be stopped if every
sports person
Correct your spelling
sportsperson
show examples
is screened for banned substances in their body before each major competition. Multiple blood , urine and other samples must be obtained and should be
analised
Correct your spelling
analysed
for various drugs and if the results turn out positive the culprit must face
necessary
Correct article usage
the necessary
show examples
consequences.
This
method will ensure
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
fair and healthy sportsmanship and eliminate the problem at hand.
For example
,
according to
the Times Of India, the usage of drugs in professional
sports
has gone down since India started testing players more vigilantly. In conclusion, the growing phenomenon of usage of unauthorised substances in
sports
is primarily
due to
expectation
that is
projected on the player by millions of people and it can easily be solved by running tests on the athlete.
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coherence cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a basic structure, but it lacks clearly distinct paragraphs which are essential for organizing your ideas effectively. Ensure that your introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion are separate and that each main point is elaborated in its own paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction contains a thesis statement but it seems abrupt and is not fully developed. A more comprehensive introduction that paraphrases the question and outlines your argument would be beneficial. The conclusion is present but is underdeveloped. You should summarize your main points and restate your position firmly without introducing new ideas.
task achievement
Your main points are present but not fully supported with examples or explanations. It is important to expand on each point with specific details or evidence. Additionally, the prompt asked for causes and solutions, but your treatment of these categories is unbalanced, with more attention needed on exploring the possible solutions in more depth.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Get your IELTS Essential Vocabulary List —
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Performance-enhancing drugs (PEDs)
  • Doping
  • Anti-doping regulations
  • Detection methods
  • Ban substances
  • Ethical issues
  • Health risks
  • Fair play
  • Sportsmanship
  • Stakes
  • Pressure to succeed
  • Enforcement
  • Awareness programs
  • Testing frequency
  • Entourage
  • Science advancement
  • Financial gains
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