IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job. say why he/she would not enjoy going to college explain why getting a job is a good idea for him/her suggest types of job that would be suitable for him/her

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Dear Jay Hope you're doing good. I understand you are in a deep state of dilemma and want my opinion over whether to take up a start your working life or continue with your studies. My suggestion is to opt for a . Knowing you since childhood, I have always seen you doing things practically rather than following the theory. Doing a job enable you to have an insight into how things actually work in a
real- job
Correct your spelling
real-job

The word real- job seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

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 scenario. Being a curious person, sitting in a classroom again is something you may not like. Working at
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 stage of life would benefit you immensely as it will allow you to break your comfort zone. Not only
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
Add the word(s)
but,

The sentence is missing part of the not only ... but also construction. Consider adding the missing word(s).

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you will
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 be turned into a disciplined individual due to the demand of a competitive workplace.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 academic prowess has an instrumental role in shaping one's career, I still believe jumping onto a workplace is rather a better choice in your case. Now, the sector you should go
in
Change preposition
into

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 is certainly marketing. As you have extremely engaging
inter-personal
Correct your spelling
interpersonal

The word inter-personal doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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 skills,
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 domain is meant specially for people like you. I am quite sure that
a
Correct article usage
the

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 role of marketing head or even a field agent would help you to excel in your professional career. I hope with my guidance, you are now clear about what to do
next
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

. Best wishes Sonam

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Real-world experience
  • Practical experience
  • Financial independence
  • On-the-job training
  • Student loan debt
  • Personal growth
  • Professional networking
  • Career development
  • Skilled workers
  • Job market
  • Career goals
  • Immediate income
  • Professional relationships
  • Market demand
  • Defining interests
  • Educational investments
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