IELTS Writing Correction Service / Writing Samples / Band 5 In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of this. How can we deal with those causes?

As the world is developing, the wrongdoing is bursting simultaneously. Around various nations,

this

Linking Words

phenomenon is often frequent. In my opinion, the principal cause of the increased offence rate is poor laws, unemployment and insecurity;

however

Linking Words

, it can be curbed by focusing on the facets that arise the same. Fundamentally, various factor makes the crime amount goes up in many countries recently, and there are myriad reasons to substantiate.

First

Linking Words

and foremost, the poor laws against criminals in many countries give the best opportunities for them to perform

such

Linking Words

activities.

As a result

Linking Words

, the number of crimes increases naturally.

Moreover

Linking Words

, nowadays, many people are unemployed, owing to which they often indulge in extravagant activities, like gang-raps and gang-wars.

Similarly

Linking Words

, they get in touch with psychological disease, including depression, which encourages them to do so.

Nonetheless

Linking Words

, there are various measures which could be taken to lower the crime rate. Chiefly, authorities must implement a good bundle of laws and orders to give offenders a relevant punishment, including imprisonment, or hanging in rape cases.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, the reduction in an unemployment percentage would work as a good remedy for the increased inappropriate activities. What is more, if civilians learn how to manage their security on their own by carrying some weapons with them, the crime rate would decrease eventually. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

the misdeed is increasing worldwide fastly, it can be depressed by taking some possible measures. The predominant cause to

this

Linking Words

is the distraction of mind due to lack of employment and the poor sight of government; the same can be reduced by managing these problems.