IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Some people believe that government should make investment in building public libraries in every town, while others think it is a waste of money because we have access to information via internet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #government #investment #libraries #town #waste #money #access #information #internet
As the popularity of the
internet
 is growing
day
 by
day
, many people hold the opinion that there is no point keeping the
library
 facility in every city. By
the
Remove the article
apply
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contrast, other people have conflicting views and as per them, the regime should spend some budget
in
Verify preposition usage
on
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 building the libraries. While
,
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apply
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 to some extent
Add a comma
,
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I
also
 agree on the
later
Correct your spelling
latter
show examples
 viewpoint. To commence with, there are multifarious reasons, why many people hold the opinion that the state government should not spend the amount in maintaining the public
library
.
Firstly
, as per
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them
Correct your spelling
the
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 most of the information, which are available in the books is easily accessible using the
internet
.
Moreover
, if a city has more libraries,
then
 the overall maintenance cost would be quite high, which would be a bit difficult for the regime of incipient countries to afford. Maintenance cost
such
 as paying a salary to the librarian, cleaning staffs and people helping and keeping the records of the books.
On the contrary
, other people think that
l
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the
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ibrary has its own importance, because of the various reasons.
First
 and foremost, there are many people
such
 as people of the older generations, still prefer to read the information either through books or in
the
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magazines. As per them reading on the computer using the
internet
 is not convenient and it can lead to the several health issues,
such
 as pain in the eyes,
in addition
 to severe back pain and the neck pain. These predicaments are very common, especially in the younger generations as they spend most of their leisure time sitting in front of the computer.
Furthermore
, since the olden days
Add a comma
,
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the
library
 has been considered, as an essential place for quiet and silent reading.
Consequently
, students prefer to study in the
library
 during their exams for better concentration. To recapitulate, in my viewpoint, even though, usage of the
internet
 is growing
day
 by
day
; we still require a place like a
library
 for better concentration in the studies.
Submitted by binitadangol76 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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