Some people believe that money is the most important factor for achieving happiness. However, others believe that happiness has nothing to do with money. Do you agree or disagree? Give your own opinion and examples.

Despite

money

is considered by many people to be one of the most vital aspects contributing to happiness, I believe that it is possible to be happy in

life

even if an individual owes limited wealth.

This

essay will

firstly

, discuss the fact that

money

does not necessarily bring peace of mind and

secondly

, it will describe how good relation turns out to be the best treasure for a human.

To begin

with, it is true that

money

can help people to fulfil their desires and become happy,

however

, it does not necessarily follow that people with less property are unhappy. To elaborate, a lot of people with a huge revenue do not seem to be so happy as other underprivileged people, for many reasons, may it be, family bonds or work-

life

balance.

For example

, most of the developed countries are falling behind the developing nations in terms of contentment index as they are stressed with the fast-paced corporate culture.

Therefore

, not being able to spare some time for your personal

life

while earning wage cannot make a human feel true peace and enjoyment.

Secondly

, happiness is critically influenced by the love and care a man gets from his family and friends. To explain

further

, while

money

can bring opportunities to enjoy the pleasures, few people would enjoy them on their own.

For instance

, if a person is having a handsome salary but has no one around to be with him and share the love and affection, he is most likely to be upset with is

life

Thus

, being surrounded by a loving and affectionate family is more valuable than any amount of capital. To conclude,

money

is not a prime factor for happiness, despite being unfortunate in terms of richness, a person can be happier in

life

Moreover

, it is care and love of family that makes a person enjoy the best of

this

life

Submitted by Musaib ul hassan on Tue Dec 15 2020

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

316 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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