People after retirement often require financial assistance. Should the government be responsible for this or should the individuals make provisions for themselves? Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #retirement #assistance #government #individuals #provisions

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

As human’s lifespans have greatly increased, many retired seniors suffer from financial issues. While some people argue that each citizen should prepare provisions by themselves to mitigate

this

Linking Words

problem, but I believe that governments should have responsibility for

this

Linking Words

. Some claim that individuals should prepare their own budgets because governments might not be able to support retired people financially. When emergency cases occur, governments spend their profits on these.

For instance

Linking Words

, the huge earthquake happened on the eastern side of Japan in 2011, its government used more than 40 per cent of revenue for rebuilding, which brought that the cost of retired seniors’ pensions slightly declined.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, people can have more fruitful lives since they can freely spend their

money

Use synonyms

Although

Linking Words

the amount of

money

Use synonyms

from governments limited, people can use their

money

Use synonyms

flexibly if they have a lot of savings.

However

Linking Words

, I believe that governments should help retired people financially because governments have

Remove the article

apply

show examples

play a role of providing a secure life for all citizens. If governments do not support financially, many people especially low-income household cannot survive their lives since they do not have saving but their expenditures rise due to medical costs.

In addition

Linking Words

, it is difficult to live spending all their savings. With increasing life expectancy, people can live a longer period of time without income and

therefore

Linking Words

, even though people save

money

Use synonyms

before retirement, they need financial aid from governments. In conclusion, while it is true that individuals should prepare post-retirement budgets by themselves, I insist that governments should be responsible for supporting retired people because supporting all citizens is an essential role for governments.

Submitted by aiko.miyazaki123 on Fri Dec 18 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

270 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

financial assistance
retirement
provisions
governmental pension plans
social security
welfare programs
financial literacy
private pensions
savings accounts
investments
economic stability
poverty line
safety net
personal responsibility
incentivizing

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
These days Internet-based courses have become a popular alternative to university-based courses. Some students prefer this type of learning because they do not need to attend lectures. Others argure that it is important to study at university. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
In the recent years, online classes has taken place of the on-compus ones and it has become vastly popular among both students and professors. Some of the enrollments choose these classes over the old ones so there is no need for them to go to the university, while others believe that the importance of precense at the academy is undeniable. In my point of view, internet-based classes are more efficient and modern than the old-fashioned, on-campus ones.
6.5
band
In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.
In industrial countries, average longevity is rising, resulting in some negative impacts on citizens and councils. This essay will discuss the disadvantages of this matter as well as some ways to tackle them.
6.5
band
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
Statistics show that the world's population is increasing rapidly. It is expected that most of us will be living in cities within the next few decades. The question of whether urbanisation is a positive or negative development remains controversial.
4
band
It has become very common for people to borrow money. Maby people have credit card, a mortgage and often they buy a car on credit card as well. Is this a good idea or this is too risky? Discuss both views abd give your own opinion.
The trend of desuming money has been normalised. A lot of individuals having credit card, utilize it in order to become the owner of a vehicle and a house. Depending on the ability of managing budget, these ideas can be either advantageous or disadvantageous.
5
band
Traffic on roads has become a problem in nearly every country in the world. What can be done to reduce the amount of traffic at a society level and at an individual level?
Traffic on roads is one of the widely discussed issues in approximately every country in the world. It is undeniable that vehicles have become an essential part of people’s lives. In this, essay I will explore solutions to decrease the amount of traffic at both societal and individual levels, as well as examine factors contributing to its effects.

People after retirement often require financial assistance. Should the government be responsible for this or should the individuals make provisions for themselves? Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

These days Internet-based courses have become a popular alternative to university-based courses. Some students prefer this type of learning because they do not need to attend lectures. Others argure that it is important to study at university. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

It has become very common for people to borrow money. Maby people have credit card, a mortgage and often they buy a car on credit card as well. Is this a good idea or this is too risky? Discuss both views abd give your own opinion.

Traffic on roads has become a problem in nearly every country in the world. What can be done to reduce the amount of traffic at a society level and at an individual level?