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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

When people move to another country, some of them decide to follow the customs of the new country. Others prefer to keep their own customs. Compare these two choices. Which one do you prefer? Support your answer with specific details.

#people #move #country #customs #two #choices #support
With the globalisation, the trend of individuals immigrating to other countries has increased. Some of the people adapt to the customs and traditions of the
community
 in which they have shifted to,
however
Add a comma
,
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the others stick with their native
culture
. In the following paragraph
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,
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I would like to delve into both the choices before forming an opinion. There is an old saying that be a Roman when in Rome. When one immigrate to the other
country
, following the local traditions and
culture
 helps the natives to get comfortable with that immigrant, and
also
 aid the individual's socio-economic growth.
For example
 when a
person
 starts business in any foreign
country
,
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apply
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 if that
person
 is aware of the local
culture
 the people of that place get more comfortable with him.
Moreover
Add a comma
,
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that
person
 is entrusted with business dealings as well by locals.
Thus
 adapting to the proverb mentioned above has a lot in the overall growth of a
person
.
However
, there are certain people who keep on following their native customs and traditions even in foreign countries. When they practice their values and beliefs in synchronisation with the local
culture
, it helps the natives to better understand their traditions. It
also
 helps in earning the respect of natives for their
community
 and values as they act as representatives of their
community
 in
f
Add an article
a
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oreign
country
 To conclude with, I am of the opinion that even though adapting to the customs and traditions of the new society, helps in a
person
's growth in that
community
 but one should follow his own
culture
 in a foreign
country
 but should respect the
culture
 n traditions of locals as well. As it will make bring both the societies in harmony by making the natives understand their beliefs.
Submitted by naresh on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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