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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In many societies, elderly people often live in retirement homes. This is not appropriate because families should always care for their aging members. Do you agree?

#societies #people #retirement #homes #families #care #members
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The question of an
aging
Change the spelling
ageing
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 society has become very controversies around the world. Some people argue that the rest family member has to attend to an ageing person who has struggled from diseases or movement problems. Regarding
this
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 issue, I partially agree with that argument. Following are the reasons, including other caring means.
To begin
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 with, the advances in the nursing
care
Use synonyms
 of hospitals old people could expect quality services without their family members. Before
this
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 development, they could not imagine living in a hospital to promote health
However
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, using the cutting-edge development of treatment system, so they could take
care
Use synonyms
 appropriate cares staying medical facilities.
In addition
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, senior citizens could enjoy various activities with their friends or relax in large spaces of health
care
Use synonyms
 room, those do not exist individual houses.
Therefore
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, all family members could get positive effects.
On the contrary
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, it is believed that house caring has a positive side as well.
Firstly
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, the old generation could prepare for death with family, sometimes they could share a specific experience and even comment on the
last
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 sentence before dying. On top of that, other family members
also
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 could cope with the
last
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 moments.
Hence
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, not only for nursing and health
care
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 but
also
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 they could build up valuable memories. Because of these reasons, family want to spend time together, even though it could be time-consuming for caring
of
Verify preposition usage
for
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 using their spare time. To sum up, housing
care
Use synonyms
,
although
Linking Words
 it has more useful methods to
care
Use synonyms
 for elderly people using medical facilities, is more likely to have valuable time.
Consequently
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, families could choose a suitable way depends on their circumstance.
Submitted by kooji6856 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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