One of the consequences of improving medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Over the past years
Add a comma
,
show examples
the field of medical
care
has drastically evolved. The numerous research studies and their successful result helped the society to improve the standards of medical
care
. Like the recent development in
h
Add an article
the
show examples
uman genome project and
drug
Add a comma
,
show examples
analysis made a great impact in helping scientist to design drugs with high accuracy with
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
side effects.
This
change led to the cure diseases, protection against infections leading to a healthy lifestyle, as an ultimate outcome the life expectancy
also
increased. The life expectancy is the average age a human can live in a population. As the technological innovations in med-
care
led to
g
Add an article
a
show examples
reater understanding of
r
Add an article
the
show examples
esponse of our body to
treatment
. For
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
example, a recent study named
as
Verify preposition usage
apply
show examples
medical coding mainly focused on the storage of medical data and reports in
c
Add an article
the
show examples
omputer over a long period of time. Becoming a pathway to analyse clinical errors, improved diagnosis and test reports. Some of the drawbacks
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
that in certain case people get immune to
c
Add an article
the
a
show examples
ertain
drug
used for curing a disease. Scientist experiment and explained that when a person is exposed to certain
treatment
which
involve
Change the verb form
involves
show examples
p
Add an article
a
show examples
eriod of time, their cell function might get immune to
d
Add an article
a
show examples
rug resulting in
c
Add an article
a
show examples
risis. With the increase of technology and ideology of medical
care
Add a comma
,
show examples
they cost of
treatment
is
also
increasing, which result as
p
Add an article
a
show examples
roblem to people below poverty line creating an unbalance in society.
Although
the medical
care
improved in every part of
f
Add an article
the
show examples
ield like
drug
treatment
and diagnosis which results to extend the life expectancy. It is important to ensure that the government implement rules and regulations which facilitates the availability to people of all range and sector.
Submitted by pavithirasrisubramani on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • life expectancy
  • elderly population
  • health care systems
  • pension funds
  • extended family relationships
  • quality of life
  • aging population
  • economic growth
  • volunteer work
  • expertise
  • financial planning
  • retirement
  • age-related diseases
  • medical research
  • healthier lifestyles
What to do next:
Look at other essays: