Most societies has its homeless people. Some people think that the best way to help them is to give them money. To what extent do you agree ?

#societies #people #money

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In the 21st century,

people

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have seen numerous ups and downs. These oscillations of

life

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have left many

people

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homeless either because of loss in business or

cause

Correct your spelling

because

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of debt. To help the homeless

people

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, it is argued that giving them

money

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will help them. I strongly stand against

this

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notion. In

this

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essay, why providing homeless

people

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money

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, do nothing to encourage them to change their

life

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and

instead

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of helping them to earn on their

Change preposition

apply

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own do good will be discussed.

To begin

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with,

people

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without homes should be helped to get work and handing over the

money

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should be avoided.

Additionally

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, persons who lost their houses are generally in mild depression

due to

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their situation. whilst offering them cash is a good deed, leaving no other motivating factor to improve their status quo.

For instance

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, one who gets the capital out of empathy will not work for it and continuously seek others to give him

fund

Fix the agreement mistake

funds

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thus

Linking Words

, his situation remains unchanged.

Therefore

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, helping the homeless by giving them

money

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does not help to encourage them to transform their

life

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Furthermore

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, the

money

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giving

Change the form of the verb

given

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away to houseless

one’s

Change noun form

ones

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will be spent on socially unacceptable activities like gambling and consumption of alcohol

due to

Linking Words

their mental instability.

Moreover

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, getting homeless is depressing in itself and if they get cash without any hard work will go

Change preposition

into

show examples

either gambling or drinking. Alternatively, they must be helped to earn their own bread and butter

channelizing

Verb problem

channelling

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their mental stress positively.

For example

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, homeless

people

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who were rehabilitated into society by organisations lead a more productive

life

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as compared to those who do not.

Hence

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people

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without a roof over their

Fix the agreement mistake

heads

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head

Fix the agreement mistake

heads

show examples

should be helped to make an earning rather than giving away

money

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. In summary, in my opinion, giving cash to

homeless

Correct article usage

the homeless

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will do no better to them mentally and even they will dwell

into

Change preposition

show examples

the scenario

due to

Linking Words

alcoholism.

However

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, they must be helped by other means to get back to normal lives.

Submitted by satbirdhindsa.sd on Thu Dec 31 2020

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task response

Ensure that the essay addresses the task prompt fully and provides a clear position with relevant supporting points.

coherence and cohesion

Improve the logical progression of ideas and use cohesive devices to connect the paragraphs and ideas.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

333 words

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Buying things on the internet, such asbooks, air ticket and groceries, is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping this way outweigh the disadvantages?

Some parents think computer games are better for children and they should be allowed to play more of them. Whereas some parents argue that they are harmful to children, both your point of views and your opinion.

Some people think that they can make as much noise as they want, while others think that the amount of noise people make should be strictly controlled.   Discuss both views and include your own opinion and examples.