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It is universally accepted that eating too much sugar has a negative effect on people’s health. Therefore, some believe that the government should control the amount of sugar people consume. Others think that it is the responsibility of an individual to monitor their sugar intake. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#sugar #effect #people’s #health #believe #government #control #amount #people #responsibility #intake
It is often argued that eating too much
sugar
 will
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
 your health. Others think that people who have
control
 should do something about it. In
this
 essay, I will discuss both views.
Also
, I will show both advantages and disadvantages.
First,
who thinks that the government should
control
 their
sugar
 is wrong for many reasons.
For example
, the government will lose money if they cut
sugar
 around the country, so, they need to produce more
sugar
 content for
country's
Correct article usage
the country's
show examples
 benefit, those people need to take responsibility for cutting the
sugar
 , not the country and there are many solutions to avoid
sugar
. One of those is, to try to replace those with something less
sugar
 like diet snacks and try to be consistent with it. On the other side. There are many people who want the leadership to take
control
 over
sugar
 and they have a point about that, they don't have the ability to eat food without
sugar
 because of the dopamine.
In addition
, maybe they live in a place where all the
sugar
 around them so they can not stop themselves from eating it.
Therefore
, maybe they need someone to guide them about the disadvantages of eating
sugar
. In conclusion. In my point of view, I think that human needs someone to guide them because you can not know what maybe
this
 thing will cause, maybe a good thing or a bad thing.
Furthermore
, there are many advantages and disadvantages, only one who can
control
 it is you.
Submitted by bcynfn159 on

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introduction conclusion present
Your essay would benefit from a more structured introduction. It's important to clearly state the topic and then outline the main points you will cover in your essay.
clear comprehensive ideas
Try to develop each point more thoroughly. Providing detailed examples or explanations can help strengthen your argument and improve clarity.
logical structure
Work on logical structure by ensuring that each paragraph flows smoothly to the next. Use transition words and phrases to guide the reader.
logical structure
You've presented a balanced discussion, considering both sides of the argument.
introduction conclusion present
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your opinion and relates back to the discussion points raised in your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • negative effect on health
  • government control
  • sugar consumption
  • public awareness campaigns
  • excessive sugar
  • regulations
  • tax on sugary products
  • limits for sugar levels
  • manufacturers
  • accountability
  • freedom of choice
  • health implications
  • dietary habits
  • lifestyle changes
  • reading labels
  • healthier alternatives
  • self-regulation
  • personal accountability
  • external regulations
  • public health measures
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