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Writing Samples
Band 7

Many offenders commit more crime after serving their first punishment. Why is this happening and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?

#offenders #crime #first #punishment #measures
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Many felonies after being imprisoned for the
first
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 time, they continue to commit crimes
further
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,which could be due to a number of reasons.
This
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 essay will elucidate the reasons of increased crimes by felonies and
also
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 advocate the necessary measures required to be taken to tackle
this
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 growing issue.
Firstly
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,In most of the prisons across globe offenders who have committed different crimes are put together in a cell,which poses to be a bad influence to the people who have committed minor offences like petty theft or corruption.
Furthermore
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, the society continues to be indifferent towards people who have served time irrespective of how minor their offences are, and
also
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 getting a job would always be challenging as most of the organisations refuse to give them an opportunity,and because of all these reasons recidivism rate has been increasing in the recent past.
Although
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 one cannot justify crime and needs to be punished according to the law,
however
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 for minor crimes like petty theft or corruption they can choose an alternative way of punishing rather than shutting them in jail.
For instance
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 : In countries like south Korea for minor crimes offenders are made to do mandatory community services.
Also
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 society needs to stop discriminating prisoners and not allowing them to make a living. It is imperative that organizations must come forward and offer them jobs and learn to trust and give them a
second
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 chance in life as not everyone who commits crime are bad people To recapitulate,
Although
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 in the recent past there has been an increase in recidivism crimes
this
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 can
also
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 be tackled and reduced by using the various methods mentioned earlier.
Submitted by Varsha on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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