Film stars and music celebrities may earn a great deal of money and live in luxurious surroundings, but many of them lead unhappy lives. Do you agree? To what extent is this the price they pay for being famous?

#film #stars #music #celebrities #money #surroundings #lives #price

Film land is a fantasy world and the celebrities and stars have a

life

filled with luxuries. They do not have the scarcity of money but most of the

movie

stars lead a disastrous personal

life

. I agree with the notion of

movie

stars not happy with their lives and to a certain extent, leading an unhappy

life

is the price they pay in return to their

fame

earned.

First

and foremost, in today's world,

fame

is earned rather quickly when compared to the older days. After attaining the status of celebrity, not everyone is capable of handling

fame

. Some make silly mistakes and some get trapped in the web of

fame

For instance

, there are many superstars who struggled in handling the popularity in their initial days and cultivated bad habits of drugs. These are not a sign of any human enjoying his personal

life

Besides

, celebrities are covered closely by today's news channels or social media platforms. they do not enjoy the privacy like other commoners. Even the slightest of movement of theirs

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

is closely watched by the world. People are bound to make mistakes,

however

movie

stars cannot afford to make mistakes in their lives as that can blow out of proportion in the media. To a certain extent, it is the

fame

which brings

such

a situation to them, because there are millions of people who are following their behaviour. The pressure of meeting that expectation is not possible by everyone. In conclusion, I agree that

fame

comes with a price and the price is ruining their personal lives for

movie

stars.

Although

, they do not lack the

life

of luxury and comfort, the happiness and leading a peaceful

life

is not so an easy task for any of the celebrities.

Submitted by niranjan.appaji on Thu Jan 07 2021

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

295 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Film stars and music celebrities may earn a great deal of money and live in luxurious surroundings, but many of them lead unhappy lives. Do you agree? To what extent is this the price they pay for being famous?

Fully explain your ideas

Currently there is a trend towards the use of alternative forms of medicine. However, at best these method are ineffective, and at worst that may be dangerous. To what extent did you agree with this statement.

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehical will be passenger. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that money is one of the most essential factors in promoting happiness. Do you think people can be happy without much money? What other factors contribute towards happiness?

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same thing and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Some people think that it is better for a country's economy for people to spend money while others believe that it would be better for people to save money. Discuss both views and give your opinion.