Some people do not mind to spend their leisure time with their colleagues while some people prefer to keep their private life separate from their work life Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

The idea of spending free
time
with co-workers has always been a subject of debate. There are some
people
e
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who

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njoy spending their leisure
time
with their colleagues, whereas there are other
people
like to keep their private
life
separate from their official
work
life
.
Although
arguments on both sides are worth exploring, I firmly believe that having
p
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a

The noun phrase personal life seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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ersonal
life
is more preferable but
this
idea
have
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has

The verb have does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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the
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apply

It appears that the is unnecessary in this context. Consider removing it.

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certain reasons
of
Verify preposition usage
for

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debate. On one hand, some
people
prefer to
hangout
Correct your spelling
hang out

The word hangout doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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with their colleagues after
work
or on the weekend. They rather
choosing
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choose

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb choosing. Consider changing it.

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to spend their free
time
with
people
from
work
instead
of spending more
time
with friends or family in their
life
out of
work
. If it works well, it could be a great opportunity to raise the teamwork by being familiar with
people
at
work
and
g
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a

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reat chance to get promotion prospect.
On the other hand
, there are those who prefer to enjoy their own
time
apart from the
work
. It is commonly observed that many
people
feel more stressful due to the pressure of being closer with their seniors even though they do not want to.
However
, it is obvious that it is simply not necessary to be familiar with co-workers unrelated to
work
.
Moreover
, it probably makes them feel like a
longer
Replace the word
long

The word longer doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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day at
work
.
Finally
, given the choice between the two, I strongly believe that keeping private
life
apart from
j
Add an article
a
the

The noun phrase job seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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ob without any possible way to engage in
work
is more beneficial than the opposite side. By doing so,
work
efficiency will be more productive and get more energetic because of the better
work
Add a hyphen
work-life

It appears that work life is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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life
balance.
Submitted by kooji6856 on

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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