Zoos should be banned because it is cruel to keep wild animals in captivity. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#zoos #animals #captivity

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Zoos

, nowadays, are becoming very popular before ever.

However

, an argument has been pushed forward that creatures in zoological

parks

are treated with extremely low-grade conditions

and

Correct word choice

which

show examples

might harm them physically and psychologically. I partially agree with the given notion since

zoos

are the best place for education and leisure purposes yet

ministry

Correct article usage

the ministry

show examples

must keep an eye on it. Fundamentally, various

factor

Fix the agreement mistake

factors

show examples

makes

Verb problem

apply

show examples

agree with the presented argument, and there are myriad reasons to

substantiate

Correct pronoun usage

substantiate it

show examples

Firstly

, The

wild-animals

Correct your spelling

wild animals

show examples

in zoological

parks

get food without any struggle.

Means

Correct pronoun usage

This means

show examples

to says, the struggle is the best teacher of life, but if struggle gets eliminated from life, the beasts would lose their identity and even their

corwn

Correct your spelling

own

crown

For example

, tigers generally eat food in cages without any hunting practice, after which they will not be able to hunt if they are released to wild habitats.

Secondly

, creatures in menageries usually feel slavery. Animals, like humans,

also

have internal

feeling

Fix the agreement mistake

feelings

show examples

and emotions, which enable them to observe the difference between life in cages and forests.

However

, there are

also

some positive aspects of keeping wild animals in

zoos

. Chiefly,

zoos

are the best places for research and investigation of various facets of a particular animal.

The university

Correct article usage

University

show examples

students frequently visit

zoos

in order to understand the behaviour of animals and to complete their assignments. yet if beasts could be released from these

parks

, it would be a difficult task for investigators to know about wildlife in dense forests.

Moreover

, the typical population can not visit the forest to watch wild species and for them, the

zoos

are the best alternatives.

This

process

also

includes the revenue to

regional

Correct article usage

the regional

show examples

ministry through the sales of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

tickets for visiting

such

parks

. In conclusion, many think, and I partially agree, that

zoos

harm wild-beasts in some ways, including physically and psychologically, but positive facets of

such

areas can not be neglected because these

parks

provide locals and educational people to fulfil their requirements. The government must impose some restrictions on

zoos

in regard to harming creatures.

Submitted by sajanbrar0 on Tue Jan 12 2021

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task response

The essay partially addresses the task but lacks a clear position on the issue. The supporting points are relevant but need clearer development and organization. The conclusion should clearly state the writer's position on the issue.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, the development of supporting points lacks coherence and cohesion. Improved transition and organization of ideas are needed to enhance coherence.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

339 words

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