IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

When families have a meal together it is considered social activity. Do you think eating together is important to people in your country?

#families #activity #people #country
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When a group of people gather together it is already a social activity.
Therefore
Linking Words
, a
home
Use synonyms
 that eats at the same
time
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the table is essential in my country.
Firstly
Linking Words
, a house without a family is not a
home
Use synonyms
, and each household should have a meal together, not a single person would eat if not all of them
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 at
home
Use synonyms
,
everyone
Correct word choice
and everyone
show examples
 must wait before eating.
For instance
Linking Words
, in my country, we eat three times a day, and every meal we
will
Verb problem
apply
show examples
eat our food together as a family because we value the essence of unity and it's our culture to leave no one behind.
Secondly
Linking Words
, it is important to build a relationship, especially among siblings and parents.
For example
Linking Words
, statistics say that nowadays, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
parents
didn't
Wrong verb form
don't
show examples
 have
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 intimate relationship with their children but they can change that by doing things, like during dinner, they could ask how's there day
, like
Add a missing verb
is, like
show examples
 work or school, through that, they could know what is happening inside and outside of their
home
Use synonyms
. They could spend a lot of
time
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
with
show examples
 their friends but they could make
time
Use synonyms
 for their family.
However
Linking Words
, in
this
Linking Words
 world today, generations change.
Time
Use synonyms
 runs so fast and everyone
work
Correct subject-verb agreement
works
show examples
 too much and
neglect
Correct subject-verb agreement
neglects
show examples
 the opportunity to make
time
Use synonyms
 for their kids, husband and wife. People kept themselves busy just to earn money and forget their
home
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, what matters most in
this
Linking Words
 world are those people who
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
 stick with you,
either
Correct word choice
whether
show examples
 you are in your ups and downs in life and that's your family, so make
time
Use synonyms
 for them by spending your
meal
Fix the agreement mistake
meals
show examples
 with your
love
Replace the word
loved
show examples
 ones.
Submitted by abaloraemie on

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task response
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coherence and cohesion
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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