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Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

#people #work #hours #time #leisure #activities #situation
A vast number of people
work
 long hours,
therefore
 they have no free
time
 for other
activities
, and I would argue that working hard has several drawbacks,
such
 as boredom and illness, which I would like to explain in following paragraphs. The
first
 reason which I elaborate on is fatigue. From a psychological perspective, Working too
much
Change the quantifier
many
show examples
 hours leads to weariness both mentally and physically, which is contribute to lower efficiency at
work
. I believe if you spend your spare
time
 on attractive
activities
, you will be fresher at your
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
. Due to the many healthy routines, expertise always emphasis on exercise especially
at
Verify preposition usage
in
show examples
 morning on
d
Add an article
a
show examples
aily basis since it has a significant effect on your brain. They admitted after working out your brain become more efficient and you may make better decisions at your job.so having spare
time
 is
also
 important
on
Verify preposition usage
in
for
show examples
 your
work
 performance. Another demerit is
depression
. When you always be busy and has
u
Add an article
an
the
show examples
ninterrupted duty, you may lose your group of friends and family gradually. So after a short
time
Add a comma
,
show examples
you find yourself very lonely and you realize you detached from those precious things in your life.
Depression
 brings about lack of motivation both in your life and
also
 your job, so your working hours become boring for you.
Thus
 you cannot focus on your duty anymore .
As a result
 of
depression
Add a comma
,
show examples
you ought to see the psychologist with regard to resolve your issue and spend your
time
 at his office.
However
, if you had spent adequate
time
 with your peers at
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 right moment you would never have faced
such
 a problem. To sum up, I would argue that having sufficient leisure
activities
 plays a vital role in everyone’s life. Without free
time
 for fun and interesting
activities
Add a comma
,
show examples
we may face a lot of
problem
Change the noun form
problems
show examples
such
 as
depression
 and boredom.
Submitted by peymangomar on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • mental well-being
  • burnout
  • stress relief
  • productivity
  • economic growth
  • career progression
  • skill enhancement
  • quality time
  • financial security
  • leisure activities
  • physical health
  • personal relationships
  • stress-related illnesses
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