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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that children's leisure activities must be educational, otherwise they are a complete waste of time. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #children #leisure #activities #waste #time
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Some would argue that
children
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 should always learn through their leisure activities,
otherwise
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 their spare time will have no use.
This
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 essay agrees with
this
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 statement because by playing intellectual
games
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,
children
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 may develop their concentration skills and may learn how to find solutions to problems.
Children
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 should play only educational
games
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 because they help them to be more focused. By playing quiz
games
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 as well as educational computer
games
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, young generation
learn
Change the verb form
learns
show examples
 how to be concentrated on
s
Add an article
a
the
show examples
pecific issue and ignore any disturbing factors that may positively influence their
further
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 study process.
For example
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, a recent Cambridge University survey found that over 60% of
children
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 playing educational
games
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 are very diligent students.  Another significant factor is that through educational leisure activities
children
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 may develop their creativity and abilities to solve problems.
In other words
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, by acquiring new knowledge in the game process,
children
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 learn how to make up new ideas very quickly and convert them to
promissing
Correct your spelling
promising
 solutions. According to acclaimed British journal, the Economist, Japanese
children
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,
for instance
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, usually spend their leisure activities by playing sudoku and chess that have a beneficial effect on their abilities to find
promissing
Correct your spelling
promising
 solutions. In conclusion, it is thought by some that
children
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 should spend their spare time with usefulness because educational
games
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 are able to develop not only
children
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's concentration skills
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
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 their creativity and abilities to solve problems.
Submitted by gazalievam01 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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