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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Successful sportsmen can earn a great deal more than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#sportsmen #people #professions
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Famous
athletes
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 can gain higher payment than other important professions in society. It is argued by some
people
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 that it is not necessary to have someone earning a huge amount of money when there are a lot of
people
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 who do not have enough food to eat.
However
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, others think it is extremely fair because sportsmen need to dedicate themselves and work inconsistently to achieve good performances. On the one hand,
athletes
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 can represent the country as famous game players and make proud of all the
people
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 of nations as well as create a world record of the country.
Also
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, they can motivate
people
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 to practice sports more often and learn the proper diet to precessed day by day. From my own experience, games sports can influence positively young
people
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 to practice sport to gain
a
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good performance and body appearance.
On the other hand
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, some
people
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 think that it is fully wrong
athletes
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 earn a huge amount of money.
Firstly
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, other important field workers spend more time studying and working than sportspersons.
For instance
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, the scientist can be innovated, doctors can save peoples’ lives and engineer create new technology to benefit
the
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society. For all of
this
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, they could create different ways to recognize other professions as same as they do with
athletes
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 professionals. To summarize, some
people
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 suggest that some careers should deserve more money than succeded
athletes
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. Others think it is fair for them while sportsmen usually spend long term preparing for competitions to succeded. I feel that it is unfair of other professions and with
people
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 who do not have anything to eat during the day.
Submitted by Mailson on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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