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Band 6.5

Successful sportsmen can earn a great deal more than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#sportsmen #people #professions
Famous
athletes
 can gain higher payment than other important professions in society. It is argued by some
people
 that it is not necessary to have someone earning a huge amount of money when there are a lot of
people
 who do not have enough food to eat.
However
, others think it is extremely fair because sportsmen need to dedicate themselves and work inconsistently to achieve good performances. On the one hand,
athletes
 can represent the country as famous game players and make proud of all the
people
 of nations as well as create a world record of the country.
Also
, they can motivate
people
 to practice sports more often and learn the proper diet to precessed day by day. From my own experience, games sports can influence positively young
people
 to practice sport to gain
a
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good performance and body appearance.
On the other hand
, some
people
 think that it is fully wrong
athletes
 earn a huge amount of money.
Firstly
, other important field workers spend more time studying and working than sportspersons.
For instance
, the scientist can be innovated, doctors can save peoples’ lives and engineer create new technology to benefit
the
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society. For all of
this
, they could create different ways to recognize other professions as same as they do with
athletes
 professionals. To summarize, some
people
 suggest that some careers should deserve more money than succeded
athletes
. Others think it is fair for them while sportsmen usually spend long term preparing for competitions to succeded. I feel that it is unfair of other professions and with
people
 who do not have anything to eat during the day.
Submitted by Mailson on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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