IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

some people think that the best way to stay fit is to join a gym or a health club while others think doing everyday activities such as walking and climbing stairs is sufficient. discuss both the views and give your opinion.

#people #gym #health #club #activities #stairs
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some would argue that joining a fitness
club
Use synonyms
 is the most appropriate way to stay healthy, while others say doing daily routine activities like strolling and going upstairs is enough.
Although
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 get to
exercise
Use synonyms
 while performing daily mundane duties, I believe that joining a
health
Use synonyms
centre
Use synonyms
 is the proper way to stay in shape. One the on hand,
people
Use synonyms
 believe that they get enough
exercise
Use synonyms
 while doing their home chores.
This
Linking Words
 to say that they do not have to extract a particular time from their daily routine to do
exercise
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, an online survey result revealed that in the developing countries 90 per cent of
people
Use synonyms
 do not think that it is necessary for them to go to a
health
Use synonyms
centre
Use synonyms
 for staying fit. I believe that
people
Use synonyms
 should join a fitness
centre
Use synonyms
 because it motivates them to stay in shape.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, joining a
health
Use synonyms
club
Use synonyms
 motivate
people
Use synonyms
 to stay healthy.
This
Linking Words
 is because when
people
Use synonyms
 go to the gym they find more
people
Use synonyms
 there and become friends, and
then
Linking Words
 they motivate each other to go
Verify preposition usage
to
show examples
the gym and stay healthy and eventually it benefits both parties.
For instance
Linking Words
, when I was an adolescent I was lousy at doing
exercise
Use synonyms
 at home,
then
Linking Words
 I joined a fitness
club
Use synonyms
 and became a friend of
people
Use synonyms
 there, they help me a lot and I became fit and healthy. I think it is a better option to join a
health
Use synonyms
club
Use synonyms
 because
people
Use synonyms
 there encourage you to become healthy and fit. In conclusion, many would think that it enough to do routine work like strolling and going to the upper portion of the house,
however
Linking Words
, I believe one should definitely join a
health
Use synonyms
centre
Use synonyms
 because you will get motivation by seeing other fit
people
Use synonyms
 there.
Submitted by saifuddin.abdulrehman on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cardiovascular health
  • resistance training
  • physical endurance
  • muscle tone
  • caloric expenditure
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • motivational factor
  • fitness regimen
  • holistic health
  • sustainable exercise habit
  • metabolic rate
  • physical exertion
  • exercise consistency
  • health maintenance
What to do next:
Look at other essays: