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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people, while others believe that the purpose of museums is to educate. Discuss both views and give you own opinion

#people #museums #places #purpose
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It is believed that the role of a
museum
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 is to entertain
people
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whreas
Correct your spelling
whereas
 others argue that it should have more educational function. In my
opinon
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opinion
, the
museum
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 can be considered both educational and entertaining for visitors. On one hand, some would think the main function of
Use synonyms
m
Add an article
the
a
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useum is to entertain. they claim that visitors may considerably feel bored when a place is full of informative and educational content.
This
Linking Words
 is because
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m
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the
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useum has been regarded as one of the significant attraction places, where
people
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 enjoy watching
a spectacular objects
Correct the article-noun agreement
spectacular objects
a spectacular object
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 related to history.
For instance
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,
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they use interactive games and exhibitions to create a unique experience for
people
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 while others deploy cutting edge technology to revive important historical events.
This
Linking Words
 is resulted in attracting more crowds to visit
this
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 place.
On the other hand
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, advocates of the
second
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 perspective claim that
museum
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play
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plays
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 a vital role in teaching
people
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 about different aspects of life, particularly their history.It is a destination where
people
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 obtain
valauble
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valuable
 knowledge behind each object in a
museum
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. If it was used for entertaining purpose, it would negatively affect their learning process. Some museums,
for example
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, employ
t
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a
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ourist guide to give visitors educational tour while others provide
people
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 headsets so that they can listen to a detailed commentary about the exhibition. To sum up, there has been a contradiction views about whether a
museum
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 should be regarded as an entertainment or educational destination. I believe
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m
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the
a
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useum can serve both purposes because
people
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 are more likely to learn better when it is blended with enjoyment.
Submitted by khadega.amer09 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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