IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The crime rate nowadays is decreasing compare to the past due to advanced technologies which can prevent and solve crime. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is argued that the number of crimes is reduced today that to the past because of the use of scientifically improved
devices
Use synonyms
 which help to minimize crimes and solve
cases
Use synonyms
. I agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement cause advanced
devices
Use synonyms
 used by police help to identify
criminals
Use synonyms
 in a short time which makes fear in the
criminals
Use synonyms
 to do bad
activities
Use synonyms
. The technology used in investigation helps to identify suspects in less time. To explain
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
, there are many machines like Closed Circuit Television (CCTV) cameras and fingerprint detection
devices
Use synonyms
. The CCTV camera monitors individuals'
activities
Use synonyms
 which helps to find
criminals
Use synonyms
 and
due to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, there is fear among people of participating in criminal
activities
Use synonyms
. And the figure print detection device helps to identify
criminals
Use synonyms
 who committed crimes.
Hence
Linking Words
,
such
Linking Words
 scientific advanced
devices
Use synonyms
 have a great contribution to solving
cases
Use synonyms
 and reducing criminal
activities
Use synonyms
. The implementation of technical
devices
Use synonyms
 has reduced the number of illegal
activities
Use synonyms
. The use of improved scientific machines in identifying culprits had an impact on the number of illegal
activities
Use synonyms
. The rate of illegal
activities
Use synonyms
 is reduced compared to the data of the past.
For example
Linking Words
, In America, there were 500,000
criminals
Use synonyms
according to
Linking Words
 data from 1980 A.D. but at present, there are nearly 50,000 illegal
activities
Use synonyms
 done in America.
This
Linking Words
 impact on individuals committing illegal
activities
Use synonyms
 is
due to
Linking Words
 the use of gadgets to monitor people and used in solving criminal
cases
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, the gadgets used in investigation helped in reducing criminal work and solving
cases
Use synonyms
. It has
also
Linking Words
 impacted national bodies where many residents are afraid to participate in illegal
activities
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Start by presenting the topic and your viewpoint, follow with body paragraphs that support your opinion with examples, and conclude by summarizing your main points.
cohesion
Work on linking your ideas more effectively. Use a wider range of linking words and transitional phrases to make the progression of your ideas clearer and more coherent.
task response
To fully respond to the task, make sure that you address all parts of the prompt. Consider discussing opposing viewpoints or why some might disagree with your stance to provide a more balanced argument.
language
A more varied vocabulary and a stronger focus on grammatical accuracy could greatly enhance your writing. Avoid repetition and strive for precision in your language choice.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: