Some people think that high salary is important when choosing a company to work for, while other think that good working atmosphere is more important, Discuss both views and state your opinion

Many
believes
Change the verb form
believe
show examples
higher monthly income should be considered when selecting a career while others focus on a better working environment.
This
essay will cover both ideas and my perspective on the above statement. The fundamental reason for the employees to choose satisfactory payment over the working surrounding is their concern over leading a happy family life without facing any financial insecurities.
Hence
, they have the confidence to afford any domestic requirements
such
as a house, a car and branded items. A recent survey conducted by
U
Correct article usage
the
show examples
niversity of Kelaniya has revealed that most of the employees have accepted their positions, mainly, based on the monetary standards.
On the contrary
, most of the youngsters
perfer
Correct your spelling
prefer
a good professional setup rather than a company offering more money. The principle, idealogy behind
this
is, the urge to be trained under
expereinced
Correct your spelling
experienced
employers so that they are blessed with knowledge.
Additionally
,
such
an atmosphere allows the workers to explore the field freely than tying up their hands. For
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
example, a young worker at an engineering firm has stated the benefits of working under well-
educted
Correct your spelling
educated
supervisors. In my opinion, I strongly advocate that having a friendly
collegues
Correct your spelling
colleagues
to work with is much better than earning a satisfactory remuneration monthly. The best example can be taken from my life because, I still
upholds
Change the verb form
uphold
show examples
my
first
working place than my current employment, simply because of the working
arean
Correct your spelling
area
. I was much more
stress free
Add a hyphen
stress-free
show examples
back
then
even though I was occupied for many labour hours. To sum up, different communities prefer varying career
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
when picking their employers, due to their persona aims and desires.
As a result
, some look for a
six figure
Add a hyphen
six-figure
show examples
bank-balance monthly while the rest search a
compnay
Correct your spelling
company
that allows
to grow
Change the verb form
growing
show examples
.
Thus
, it is
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
individuals to decide what they want and choose a working place
accordingly
.
Submitted by u on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: