some people think that using mobile phones should be banned in public places such as libraries and public transport.To what extent do you agree with this statement ?

It is considered by many that using mobile phones in public
places
such
as in libraries,public transport and retail malls ought to be prohibited.In my opinion,mobile
devices
provide an ample amount of benefits in our daily lives,
hence
I completely disagree with
this
statement.
Firstly
,cellular
devices
can be very useful in case of emergencies
such
as accidents,medical emergencies and crime.
In other words
,
people
who have sick or elderly family members and parents expecting a call from their child,its important in
such
genuine emergencies to carry a cell phone at all times even though they are in public
places
.
Furthermore
,mobile
devices
could play an important part of
daily
Add an article
the daily
a daily
show examples
commute to work,
for
instance
Add the comma(s)
,instance
show examples
to report an accident or any medical emergency having 911 service at the touch of a button is very crucial to save lives.
Additionally
,it helps navigate directions if lost somewhere in midst of a car break down.
Thus
,
usage
Add an article
the usage
show examples
of mobile
devices
in public
places
with limited usage is acceptable and can be essential in addressing urgent issues.
Secondly
,mobile
devices
can provide entertainment when travelling on
tedious
Add an article
a tedious
show examples
journey,especially on public transport.While phones can be helpful to unwind from a chaotic day by accessing various media platforms
such
as youtube,podcasts and other streaming applications ,young
people
tend to explore the creative features of it
such
as photography and videography.
For example
,film aspirants make use of smartphone cameras when they are in public
places
to showcase their
photgraphy
Correct your spelling
photography
skills and post them on social media, while they draw a lot of attention from
people
who are in search of new talent, they
also
use it for building their career.
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
mobile
devices
can be advantageous for all these reasons,
overusage
Correct your spelling
overuse
leads to other problems
such
as stress as well as anxiety. In
conlcusion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,banning mobile phones in public
places
is a downside for
people
using public transport and other public
places
,
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
they can be used with some restrictions for a limited time that can be beneficial for all.
Submitted by panusha984 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: