Some people think that the government should be responsible for crime prevention while others believe that it is the responsibility of the individuals to protect themselves. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #government #crime #prevention #responsibility #individuals

Stopping

crime

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

become a global challenge.

Therefore

a cross-section of

individuals

believe

Change the verb form

believes

show examples

that the onus of preventing

crime

Remove the article

apply

show examples

our society should be on the government, while others are of the opinion that

individuals

should defend themselves against criminal elements.

This

essay will discuss the

importants

Correct your spelling

importance

of both views with relevant examples. Preventing

crime

in any society is extremely expensive, as

such

government

Add an article

the government

a government

show examples

should play a huge part in safeguarding the lives and properties of their citizens. institutions like the

police

, navy and air force should be adequately equipped and motivated to carry out their duties in maintaining law and order.

Also

people

should assist the

police

with critical information which will lead to

arrest

Add an article

the arrest

show examples

thiefs

Correct your spelling

thieves

show examples

in our society.

For example

, the arrest of a popular thief in Nigeria called Anini who was terrorising the whole country in 2015 was made possible by his

girlfriends

Change to a genitive case

girlfriend's

girlfriends'

show examples

information given to the

police

Individuals

protecting themselves will give opportunistic

people

powers of putting laws into their hands.

voilent

Correct your spelling

violent

will be the other of the day,

its

Change the pronoun

show examples

is a popular

believe

Replace the word

belief

show examples

when you empower

people

wrongly they

missuse

Correct your spelling

misuse

it.

For instance

, if there is a law for

people

to arm themselves at every slightest provocation they will shoot. A recent survey in the united states of America says that the

crime

rate in Arizona is on the rise because of the number of gun owners.

For example

, in March 2019, a gun runner went on a shooting spree in Arizona killing a hundred and ten

people

a situation that would have been avoided if there was no law for

people

to carry guns. In conclusion,

Change the capitalization

show examples

believe

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

should protect its citizens at the same time

individuals

should be security conscious and report to the

police

who are more equipped to deal with any security challenge.

Submitted by iyamahelias on Wed Feb 10 2021

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

305 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that the government should be responsible for crime prevention while others believe that it is the responsibility of the individuals to protect themselves. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Your opinion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The illustrations show how chocolate is produced. TASK 1

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people pf different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

Topic: Some people think that men and women have different qualities, therefore certain jobs are suitable for men and others for women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Improvement in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas. To what extent do you agree?