Today, students can benfits from widers information throgh interent.Some people think that tradition schooling disapper soon. Do agree or disagree?

As the world develops, technology is getting enhanced and more intelligent innovations are born,

thus

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most youngsters nowadays are able to access a diversity of information via the internet

for instance

Linking Words

However

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, I do not unify with the comment of traditional schooling will be erased soon since

children

Use synonyms

will presumably get stress and miss the communicating skill.

To begin

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with, it is agreeable that adolescents can have more opportunities in extending their academic with the internet because of its informative details.

Hence

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, parents are currently encouraging schools to teach online

instead

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of letting students obtain knowledge in a traditional method as usual.

Nevertheless

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this

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changes could affect the

children

Use synonyms

because

this

Linking Words

unthoughtful action is indeed to prevent them from meeting their friends

thus

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juveniles will get miserable and once human's mood has been unbalanced they hardly concentrate on any particular things.

Moreover

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, some teenagers have been getting along well with their daily life routine.

Therefore

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, a sudden decision to alter their life cause a lot of pressure on them as they require to adapt to the environment quickly.

Consequently

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, these impacts will change their behaviours toward to study and leave a plunge in their pedagogical.

On the other hand

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,in

this

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generation socializing potential is notably crucial for anybody who wants to apply for occupation in future.On that account,we can see that interacting with other online network is pushing the communicating ability away from

children

Use synonyms

Accordingly

Linking Words

, teenagers are being passive about giving a speech or a conversation since they prefer to utilize the internet as a speaking tool. To illustrate, research conducted by scientists indicates that more than 80 per cent of juveniles who are addicted to online games show their difficulties in term of talking in real life.

Then

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, we can picture a thorough image of the vital role of communication.

As a result

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,it would be a superior idea to have

children

Use synonyms

learning in a traditional way. To sum up,enhancing

Change preposition

apply

show examples

students's

Remove the s

students'

show examples

methodology of studying by preventing them to go to school in a customary procedure has linked to

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

numerous issues.

Therefore

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Change the capitalization

show examples

strongly disagree

Change preposition

with

show examples

the statement of the topic .

thien

Feb 26, 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

349 words

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Today, students can benfits from widers information throgh interent.Some people think that tradition schooling disapper soon. Do agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

Some believe that people should not continue to work once they reach the age of retirement. Do you agree or disagree?

Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion.

Many people use written language in a less formal and more relaxed way. Why? Does this developm advantages and disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.