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Writing Samples
Band 6

Many people think that keeping wild animal at the zoos has good reasons. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #zoos
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Nowadays a lot of
zoos
Use synonyms
 all over the world exist.
The society
Correct article usage
Society
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 argues, whether it
is has
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has
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 any positive reasons, or not. From my point of view, there are no positive motives for
this
Linking Words
. It can be proved by
dying
Correct article usage
the dying
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 percentage of
animals
Use synonyms
 living in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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zoos
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. A huge number of wild
animals
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, which are made to live it the city
centers
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centres
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 in front of car’s noise and people’s attention, are dying
in
Change preposition
at
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the
Correct article usage
a
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 very young ages.
For example
Linking Words
, 30% of pandas from
the
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apply
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zoos
Use synonyms
 dyed
in
Change preposition
at
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 the age of five in the
last
Linking Words
 3 years. It has been mentioned in
the
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apply
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BBC magazine in
the
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apply
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March 2020.
Moreover
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, permanent talks of humans and their huge attention have a very negative influence on
animals
Use synonyms
’ mental health.
Finally
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,
animals
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 need much more space for comfortable living, than they have in
zoos
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. Lions,
for instance
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, should walk about 30 km every day. Of course, even the latest modern
zoos
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 can not provide them
Linking Words
this
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with this
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 option. Most importantly, wild
animals
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,
such
Linking Words
 as lions, tigers, panthers and so on are hunters.
However
Linking Words
, in the
zoos
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 they a fed by mentors and can not hunt at all.
As a result
Linking Words
,
animals
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 are not prepared
to
Change preposition
for
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Add an article
the wild
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wild life
Correct your spelling
wildlife
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 and if the zoo will close one day, they would die in
the
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apply
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nature. To sum up, all
Linking Words
this
Change the determiner
these
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 examples show, that
animals
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 should not be kept in
zoos
Use synonyms
. In my humble opinion, it has more cons than pros. So, I believe, that all
zoos
Use synonyms
 will extinct in the future.
Submitted by Alina on

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