For many people, the reason they work hard is to earn money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays,
people
aspire to earn
money
.
However
, for many
people
, working hard for earning
money
is not the main cause. I completely disagree with
this
argument because other than
money
there were other reasons for which
people
work
hard and the following paragraphs
supports
Change the verb form
support
show examples
my view.
To begin
with, there are many reasons why
people
work
diligently.
First
and foremost,
people
tend to
work
potently to acquire fame among their
team
members.
For example
, fame among their
team
elevate their position and
as a
result
Add a comma
,result
show examples
they will be benefited by rewards
such
as incentives,
employee
Add an article
an employee
show examples
of the month, etc.., which boast them
furthermore
to
work
hard.
In addition
,
this
may help other
team
members to
work
passionately and build up
team
Correct your spelling
teamwork
show examples
work
.
Secondly
, many of them
work
hard for acquiring
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
quality of life.
For instance
, in
this
modern era, expenses are not reasonable.
As a result
, every individual should are working hard to achieve their desires
such
as living in expensive houses, buying new cars, family maintenance, educational expenses, food etc..,
besides
that,
people
even
work
for their passion. For evidence, they do not want to be alone and to develop their socialism
such
as friends, communication
people
work
. In conclusion, working hard for passion, satisfaction, fame and better livelihood were most among the
people
other than for
money
.
Submitted by Navyasree on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial stability
  • necessities
  • monetary rewards
  • quality of life
  • luxury items
  • dependents
  • responsibility
  • pursue
  • personal interests
  • cultural pressures
  • wealth accumulation
  • fulfillment
  • visible measure
  • correlate
  • secure future
  • comfortable lifestyle
  • entertainment
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