In today's world, private companies rather than the government pay for and conduct most scientific research. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Today in the contemporary world, we
relied
Wrong verb form
rely
show examples
more on technology.
Processors
play a vital role in the pedagogical field. Some folks believe that some
subjects
like arithmetics are well taught by using
processors
while
on the other hand
, some
community
Fix the agreement mistake
communities
show examples
believe that the processor is not enough to teach all the
subjects
. In
this
essay, we will discuss both views on the given above notion.
To begin
with, the
computer
plays an important role in learning various things.
For instance
, anybody can learn
maths
by watching various videos on the internet. Even the
computer
provides you with a calculator which
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
calculation very easy
while
learning
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
mathematic
Replace the word
mathematics
show examples
. Learning over
processors
is not time-consuming.
While learning
Correct word choice
Learning
show examples
maths
in-person
Correct your spelling
in person
show examples
in the classroom
take
Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
show examples
a lot of time. For better learning, we need to focus on our
mistakes
.
However
, if we
do
Verb problem
make
show examples
a mistake in mathematics, we don't need a teacher to find our solution, because the
computer
is enough to point out
mistakes
in our calculations.
Therefore
the
computer
helps in a very speedy way to remove our
mistakes
while
solving arithmetic questions. That's the reason
processors
are way better
to learn
Change preposition
for learning
show examples
maths
as it is more accessible and convenient to use too.
On the other hand
, there are many
subjects
which require a proper teacher to teach that subject.
Firstly
,
for example
, language
subjects
cannot learn fully by depending upon the processor. The
computer
may help us to teach various languages, but the processor cannot pick out our
mistakes
. The teacher
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
must be needed to help out
while
learning language
subjects
and to point out our
mistakes
.
Also
, teaching history
needed
Wrong verb form
needs
show examples
various aspects of discussion which the
computer
cannot provide. So
to conclude
, in my opinion in our global
village
Add a comma
village,
show examples
we cannot stay fully
depended
Replace the word
dependent
show examples
on computers. Because the
computer
might help us to learn various
subjects
like
maths
. But to become an expert and to find out the
mistakes
we need a pedagogue to understand the
subjects
thoroughly. A
computer
only can assist us in mathematics but
overall
in
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
education field, we cannot rely completely on the
computer
.
Submitted by djsayyed98 on

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Task Response
Task Response: The essay addresses the prompt, but the position is unclear. Provide a clear stance and support it throughout the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a somewhat logical structure, but the introduction and conclusion are weak. Make sure to have a clear introduction that presents the main ideas and a conclusion that summarizes the points made in the essay.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • scientific research
  • private sector
  • government funding
  • technological innovation
  • competitive nature
  • profitable outcomes
  • conflict of interest
  • corporate bias
  • economic stimulation
  • public interest
  • non-profitable
  • public welfare
  • commercial applications
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